The Journey Home - Part 2

No longer part of the Ren wagon train, Rey, Finn, and Rose must now depend on Poe to get them safely to Oregon.

Rated NC-17 for eventual smut. Part 1 can be found here.

Poe’s morning started out essentially the same as every other morning of late. He woke with the sun, checked on BB, started a fire, then used a small looking glass to shave while his coffee boiled. He ate some jerky for breakfast, then he kicked back and waited for the rest of the camp to wake and get organized. He wasn’t needed in the morning to help the travelers get ready anymore; they were all very much used to the routine now, and capable of getting everything going in the morning themselves.

The last few mornings, he had found himself sharing coffee at the Skywalker wagon, but that wasn’t an option today. Not with four armed men surrounding it. Ren had promised it was just a precaution, but Poe was pretty sure Finn had gotten no sleep. When Rey and Rose exited the wagon, they looked dang tired, too. Rey glanced his way before disappearing from Poe’s view behind the wagon. Some of the younger boys had brought the Skywalkers their oxen, and the animals were now tied to the wagon eating their grain, but they remained unyoked. Ren had made Rey swear they would stay put at least until noon, giving the train plenty of time to create distance between them.

Finally, all the other oxen were hitched and the wagons were ready to go. Normally, Poe would have BB saddled by now, but not this morning. Ren rode over to where Poe was still sitting on the ground by his fire. He stopped his black gelding right by the fire, glaring down at Poe; he had been wearing the same angry expression since his private talk with Rey the night before. Poe didn’t know what the discussion had been about, but Rey’s firm “no” was clearly not what Ren had wanted to hear.

“If you don’t get saddled and ready to ride in five minutes, you’re fired,” Ren growled.

Poe shrugged. “You didn’t hire me. You can’t fire me.”

Ren’s scowl got even deeper. “You came with a letter from one of my sponsors, correct?”

Poe nodded. “Yep. I was there when it was written.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that it was Leia Solo herself who hired me, Ren. Personally.” He didn’t say anything else, knowing that just saying Leia’s name was powerful enough.

Ren’s expression was more than a little surprised, but he quickly recovered. “If I see her, I’ll tell her you were a fine guide… until you weren’t.”

Poe just huffed a soft laugh, then gave Ren a half-hearted salute in acknowledgement.

Ren swung his horse around. “Let’s move out!” He looked at Rey, who was standing next to the tailgate of her wagon watching them. As the Hux wagon began to roll, Ren spurred his mount on in front of them. One by one, the wagons left the circle, moving back onto the barely-there road. Bill rode by, giving Poe a full salute; he had been a Sergeant in the Union Army, Poe knew, and he suspected it was Poe’s brief mention that he had also fought in the war that had helped Bill accept him. Poe stood and saluted him back.

“I’ll see you when I see you,” Bill said with a smirk.

“Ten dollars I’ll beat you to Oregon,” Poe replied.

Bill laughed. “I’m not betting against you, Dameron!” Then he rode off.

Finally, the last wagon rolled by. Rey was still standing at the back of her wagon, but as soon as the worst of the dust settled, she made her way over to Poe. She looked troubled. “Are you sure we can do this?” she asked him softly.

“You don’t trust me?” he said, tilting his head at her.

“Of course I do,” she responded immediately. “But without the safety of the train…”

Poe shook his head. “There is very little out here to fear,” he told her. “Finn and I can handle night watches for predators, and any tribes we run into won’t be aggressive. In fact, they’ll probably do their best to avoid us.” He looked after the wagons. “He wanted you to stay until at least noon. Let’s just rest today and get going tomorrow morning, shall we? I doubt any of you got much sleep last night.”

She looked exhausted. “It’s my fault,” she whispered.

“What did he ask you to do?”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “He wanted me to marry him.”

Poe couldn’t help it. He laughed out loud. She opened her eyes, her expression full of surprise, but then he saw a wry smile take over her face.

“It was all a set-up, wasn’t it?”

“Most likely,” Poe nodded. “He watched you and I together. I suppose he felt he had to trick you into marriage since you obviously weren’t interested in him.” He sighed and began to kick dirt on his fire. “I bet it was Millicent who stole those items they found in Finn’s bag. She’s a sneaky one.”

“So, you believe it wasn’t Finn?”

“Never thought it was,” Poe confirmed.

Rey smiled a bit, then turned to look back at her wagon. Rose and Finn had moved out to where the main camp fire had been the night before. With the oxen still tied to the wagon, there wasn’t much room for their regular fire. They both looked over at Rey and Poe. “What do we do with the oxen?” Rey asked, turning back toward Poe. “We don’t have a wagon corral for them to graze in anymore.”

“You have extra rope?” Poe inquired. At Rey’s nod, he continued. “We’ll make picket lines, like I do for BB. They’ll do fine grazing on a picket.” He grabbed up his belongings and started walking toward Finn and Rose. Rey followed, her face still troubled. “We’re going to be okay, Rey. I promise.”

The four of them settled in and tried to relax as the day wore on. Though the sun had risen, bright and hot, clouds moved in just before noon and the humidity shot up. Finn helped Poe find enough rope to make six picket lines for the oxen, and they moved them out away from the wagon to graze. “We’ll bring them in closer before nightfall,” Poe told him. There were sprinkles of rain early in the afternoon, but nothing significant, and the sun appeared again before four. Combined with the muggy air, it turned the day hot and uncomfortable. The women put blankets down in the shade of the wagon and the four of them lay down to doze.

They brought the oxen and BB in as the sun set, then Rose cooked up another amazing stew. It wasn’t long before Finn was passed out asleep on his blanket under the wagon, and Rey and Rose moved back inside, though they lifted up the canvas sides so air could move freely through it. Poe kept watch, but he was surprised to find out he was much more comfortable now than he had ever been with the caravan. No Ren. No Hux.

Just himself and the three people he was tasked with getting to Oregon safely.

His brain raced with thoughts about what may be ahead. He hadn’t lied to Rey; he wasn’t worried much about predators or Indians, but the road would get rougher the closer they got to the mountains and the weather would continue to be temperamental. If they should get a lot of rain and the wagon should get stuck… He shook his head. Both Rey and Rose were strong, and neither were adverse to hard work. If they should get stuck, the four of them would be able to help the oxen get it out. And he was good at reading the weather; with only themselves to answer to now, they could stop and wait out whatever was coming whenever they wanted.

He looked at the fire crackling in the night, then felt more than heard or saw movement off to his right. He turned his head to see Rey, a blanket wrapped around her nightgown clad body, walking toward him. She sat on the bench next to him, her shoulder touching his. They sat silently for a while.

“Can’t sleep?” Poe finally asked quietly.

She shrugged. “It’s quiet.”

He agreed silently. You didn’t realize how much noise all the people and animals from the caravan made at night until they were all gone. The oxen were all bedded down sleeping or chewing their cuds. BB was down as well, trusting Poe to be on the lookout for trouble.

“It is.” He looked over at her. She was staring listlessly at the fire. “Regretting saying no to Ren already?”

“Oh, Lordy, no!” Rey exclaimed quietly, turning to him. “I just…” She bit her lip and looked back at the fire. “I trust you, Poe, but I’m scared.”

“I know,” he nodded. “But sometimes the most worthwhile things in life are the most frightening.” She looked back at him, her eyes huge and shining in the firelight. “The trail they’re going to take is the most used one,” Poe told her. “The one we’re going to take is the easier one.”

Her brow furrowed. “Why won’t they take that one?”

“It goes farther north,” Poe explained. “They’re more likely to run into Indians.”

“And we’re taking it because?” He could see the worry in her eyes.

Poe smiled. “Because I know and am friends with those Indians.” He brought his arm up, wrapping it around her shoulders, something he never would have done had they still been a part of the wagon train. “I promised your aunt I would see you safely to Oregon.” He paused, but Rey’s expression showed no surprise. “I don’t intend to break that promise,” he continued.

“We’re gonna be just fine.”

******

They set out just after sunrise the next morning. Since Poe didn’t have to ride up and down the line of wagons watching over them, he spent a significant amount of the day on foot, tying BB to the rear of the wagon and walking along with them. He headed out on his horse after their stop for lunch, and not long after he disappeared from view Rey heard a rifle shot. He came riding back with a mule deer buck slung over BB’s back. The meat would feed the four of them for a long while, both as steak and jerky.

It rained that afternoon when a small, almost gentle storm rolled through, and their rain barrel was filled almost to the brim. The oxen were sound, the road was still easy to follow, and while the weather was hot and windy, it could be far worse. Their first day on their own was a good day overall.

It was a positive start.

The following days were similar. Finn and Rose both seemed far happier to be away from the caravan. They talked and laughed more freely, and Rey couldn’t help but feel happier herself, despite her anxiety about their future. Poe also seemed to open up more. He had been so stoic and watchful when around the rest of the travelers, but now he was done with keeping himself apart from others. At night, after they had eaten supper and were settled around the fire before bed, he told them stories of other wagon trains he had helped guide, and eventually he opened up about the war, too.

The days were becoming increasingly hot, and the storms that rolled across the vast prairie were not as common and seemed smaller, though they could still pack a punch. While the land was still mostly barren of trees, and Rey supposed it was still considered prairie, the terrain itself was no longer endlessly flat. The trail they followed curved around rocky bluffs and unique looking plateaus, and the types of grasses were different. They often found themselves far away from any source of water, with the bluffs preventing them from following the Platte River, and Poe recommended that they ration the water they collected from rain as much as possible. That combined with the heat and wind created some of the worst headaches Rey had ever known, but she ignored them the best she could and marched on, very aware of Poe’s worried looks.

After the first week, when she felt well enough, Poe started giving Rey riding lessons on BB. He was very much impressed by how quickly she picked it up, telling her she was a natural-born horsewoman. Rey was determined to raise horses of her own when they reached their destination. During their second week, they ran into their first wild horse herd. Mustangs, Poe called them. Descendents of horses that the Spaniards had brought to the New World over 300 years previously. Rey loved watching the stocky, tough looking horses as they came close to the wagon, curious about BB and the oxen.

One evening in late June, only a few days away from Fort Laramie, after almost a week without rain, Finn and Poe woke Rey and Rose from sleep to tell them a storm was on the way. She and Rose were up immediately, working to pull down the canvas sides of the wagon that they had put up after they stopped for the night; the sky had been perfectly clear when they had gone to bed. Finn, who had been on watch, had waited until he was sure the lightning was heading their way before he woke Poe, and they had worked at making sure the oxen’s pickets were secure before they all piled into the wagon to wait it out.

It was another violent one, making the wagon rock and the canvas leak as hail hit the top with force. Rey felt no shame as she huddled close to Poe, his arms tight around her, as Finn held Rose the same way. Finally, it was over. They left the wagon only to find the oxen and BB gone, the wind and hail having loosened their pickets and scared them enough they bolted.

“We’ll have to wait until daylight to look for them,” Poe said, his expression helpless. The sky was still cloudy, though the lightning had diminished, and it was far too dark to see well. The heavy rain had caused the ground around them to turn into a thick gumbo, and Rey knew they were stuck here for at least a day anyway. “I doubt they went far,” Poe added. For all they knew, the animals were just over the next rise.

Just before sunrise, BB wandered back to the wagon, looking exhausted. The relief on Poe’s face was palpable. “Hey, buddy. What’d you do with the oxen?” he asked softly as he looked his horse over carefully. A short time later, he jumped on BB bareback and headed off to search for the oxen while Rose started a fire and Rey and Finn checked the wagon over for any damage. Poe hadn’t even been gone an hour when they heard a distant rifle shot. Not long after, he came riding back over the ridge, leading two of the oxen, three others following.

Rey looked to see who was missing. “Yang Su?” she asked softly.

Poe sighed heavily, his expression bleak. “Broken leg,” he said. He slid off BB as Finn and Rose grabbed up the dragging ropes from the loose oxen. Rey could see tears sliding down Rose’s face. “I’ll go back to butcher what I can from him later,” Poe continued.

Rey nodded, her heart heavy. It was impossible to not get attached to their animals, but she had learned long ago that death was a part of life, and they had been fortunate they had made it this far without a loss like this.

“We should be able to purchase another steer when we get to Fort Laramie,” Poe told them when they all settled down to eat. “If we have the funds, we should maybe consider getting a couple more. We’ll need a minimum of six when we get to the mountains, and if we lose any more…”

Rey nodded. “We should have the funds for more than one, as long as they aren’t too expensive.”

“If old Ted Naster still has his store there, he’ll give me a deal.”

Rey looked at him curiously.

“Former mountain man,” Poe explained. “Helped me on a couple trips west before the war. He and his wife Kimi started the store at Laramie fifteen years ago, and she ran it by herself whenever he got the wanderlust for a few months. I’d like to think he’s too old to be going off on his own anymore, but you never know.”

“She must be a strong woman to run a store by herself in the middle of the frontier,” Rey said, a bit envious.

“She’s Pawnee,” he replied. “I’m not saying a white woman couldn’t do it,” he immediately added. “Your aunt could sure as hell do something like that.” He paused. “Pretty sure you could, too.”

Rey felt her face heat at the compliment. With her frequent headaches, her grumpiness when she was hot and tired, and her constant worry about their future, she certainly didn’t feel strong enough to do something so courageous, but his confidence in her gave her strength.

The next morning, with the sun shining hot and bright again, they yoked up their five oxen, tied BB to the back of the wagon, and headed out once more. Fort Laramie was ahead, and just beyond that, the mountains.

They were almost half-way there.

******

Fort Laramie was one of Poe’s favorite places outside of the Willamette Valley.

It was probably one of the most well-known and important locations on the frontier, and because of this it was always busy, with several temporary encampments surrounding the fort itself, as well as a few permanent structures, including Ted Naster’s trading post. But Poe was more than a little surprised as they neared the fort and he realized that most of the camps were made up of dozens of Indians.

And to think he had been worried that they would catch up to the Ren Caravan when they reached the fort.

He rode BB alongside the front of the team of oxen as they headed for Ted’s store. Yang Su’s teammate, Dòngbīn, was leading the rest of the steers by himself, plodding along calmly, occasionally looking over at BB. Poe had learned the ox seemed much happier when the horse was up front with him; he seemed almost listless when he had to move out alone. He suspected the pair had been together as a team long before Rey had taken over their care, so not only was the animal most likely confused as to why he didn’t have a partner, but he probably missed his friend.

He led the wagon toward the long, low cabin that sat about two hundred yards from the front gates of the fort, which Poe was happy to see were open; that assured him that all the native folk were here as peaceful guests. As the wagon rolled up to the cabin, an older man with white hair and beard stepped out, a big smile on his face.

“I knew you’d probably be pulling up today,” Ted said as Kimi stepped out behind him, her smile much more restrained but genuine nonetheless. She was several years younger than Ted, having been wed to him at probably sixteen or so years of age, but her confidence and strength were obvious. Ted may think he ruled the Naster household, but Kimi and Poe knew better.

“And how’d you know that, Naster?” Poe asked with a grin as he halted BB and the oxen followed suit.

“The train that moved through this morning,” Ted explained. “It was the one you were supposed to be guiding.”

“This morning?” Rey asked, stepping forward to stand at Poe’s stirrup. She looked up at him. “We’re that close to them?”

Poe winked at her, then dismounted and moved around BB to stand next to her. “You sound surprised.” He focused on Ted. “You say they moved through. Why didn’t they stay?”

Ted snorted. “Too many Indians!” He laughed, and Poe couldn’t help but laugh with him.

Poe looked around. “And why is that?” he asked. “They don’t look like ‘tame’ Indians.”

Ted shook his head. “They are not,” he confirmed. “They are here to make another treaty.”

Poe nodded, suddenly subdued. “You think it will hold?”

“I hope so,” Ted said, his expression also serious now. “If it doesn’t, the fighting will only get worse.” He shook his head. “And you know who will eventually win.”

Poe nodded sadly. He did indeed. He glanced at Rey, then back at Finn and Rose, who had stayed back, as was their norm. He looked back at Ted. “Well, unlike Ren’s train, we would like to stay a while. Until Monday?”

Ted grinned again. “You are more than welcome to stay as long as you like.”

They settled the wagon several yards from the back of the store, and once camp was made, Poe escorted Rey back to the cabin to purchase flour, sugar, salt, pepper, and a couple of small onions that could be ground into a seasoning of their own. They still had meat from Yang Su that Rose intended to make into jerky, and the extra ingredients would help her make a tasty marinade. Rey also bought three new oxen. They were bigger and younger than the five they already had, all three solid black in color. Poe determined that they could swap out two of the others to follow the wagon instead of pull it, letting the younger ones do the ‘heavy work’ for a while. They could change every day, giving the older oxen a break. When they reached the rougher roads ahead, they could put all eight in the hitch.  

By nightfall, they were settled comfortably, eating around their fire while gazing off at the dozen or so fires burning in the vicinity. Poe worried the others would be uncomfortable surrounded by so many Indians, but they didn’t seem too worried. Rey, however, was much quieter than usual. She ate only a little and then sat quietly, her shawl wrapped tightly around her shoulders even though the night was warm, her eyes downcast. To Poe, she seemed pained, and he worried once more about her headaches. She was the first to turn in, giving him a soft smile as she said goodnight.

The next morning, Poe visited the Fort, introducing himself to the commander, Major George M. O’Brien. The older man couldn’t help but mention that if Ren and his caravan hadn’t decided to move on themselves, he probably would have ‘encouraged’ it to, as soon as possible. “How did you last a week with that persnickety weasel?”

When Poe got back to the camp, he saw that Rose and Finn were being given a tour of sorts by Kimi, who seemed greatly intrigued by the couple, who were neither white nor Indian. Poe couldn’t see Rey anywhere. Once back at the wagon, he noticed the canvas on the sides had been pulled down most of the way, leaving only a slit on the bottom. This had become the norm during the hot afternoons, when they tried to keep the sun and heat out, but still wanted to leave a bit of a gap for a breeze to flow through the wagon. However, it wasn’t even mid-morning. As he got closer to the wagon, he heard the soft sound of sobbing. Without thinking, he jumped up the wooden step and pushed through the flap covering the back.

“Rey?”

She was sitting on one of the trunks along the side of the wagon, leaning over a small tub of dirty water. Only it wasn’t just dirty. It was bloody. His eyes widened and his heart started to race as he looked at her, wishing his eyes would adjust to the dimmer light in the wagon faster. “Oh, my God! Are you okay?”

She had jerked upright at his entrance, her eyes wide, her cheeks wet. “Oh!” she gasped, then reached forward to grab one of the blankets she and Rose slept with. She pulled it over the tub of water, hiding it from view. “What are you doing?”

Poe looked down at the covered tub, then back at her, realization dawning. She was washing bloody clothes from her menses. Having never actually lived with a woman since his mother died, he couldn’t say he knew a lot about a woman’s monthly, but he knew enough.

He knew it shouldn’t be making this brave, strong woman weep.

“I’m sorry,” he told her sincerely. “I heard you crying, and I know you haven’t been feeling well, so I was worried.”

She looked down and closed her eyes tight, wiping her hands on the apron around her waist. “It’s just… extra hard this month.” She brought up a hand and rubbed her forehead. “And my head won’t stop hurting.” She shook her head, took a deep breath, and looked at him. “You don’t need to know this. There’s nothing you can do.”

He sat down next to her on the trunk, bringing his hand up to gently rub her back between her shoulder blades. “You need to drink more water,” he told her softly.

She closed her eyes, letting her head fall forward. “We’re supposed to be careful with the water.”

“Yes, careful,” Poe agreed. “That doesn’t mean not drinking until you’re ready to drop. A little bit at a time, but frequently. It will help with your head.” He brought his hand up to the back of her neck, feeling how warm her skin was. Too warm. “I wish I had a suggestion for your other problem, but I’m afraid that’s beyond my expertise.”

She laughed softly. “I skipped last month,” she said, her voice almost a whisper. “Probably because of the stress of this journey and not eating right and walking all the time.” She sighed. “This is probably extra because of that.”

“Why?” Poe was genuinely curious.

She shrugged. “Nobody knows,” she said. “I only know it happens from talking with women when I volunteered in a clinic over the summer last year.” She looked at him. “The male doctors don’t seem to really care to find out the why.”

“Well, when you get settled in Aldera, maybe you should figure it out.”

She scoffed, but her lip curled up as she continued to look at him. “Maybe I will.” She blinked and wiped her cheeks, then looked back down at the tub at her feet. “I need to finish this,” she said. “I’m going to need them dry before too long.”

He nodded. “When you’re done, drink some water and take a nap. Okay?”

She looked back at him, her eyes huge. “I will.”

He rubbed the back of her neck gently again, then leaned forward and kissed her softly on the forehead. “Please,” he whispered against her skin. “If you need anything, let me know. You don’t have to do this alone, Rey.”

She nodded, and he pulled back to see that she had closed her eyes again, her expression finally relaxed. He regretfully got up from the trunk, letting his fingers linger on her skin, then turned and left the wagon.

******

Rey didn’t leave the wagon for dinner that night, but she felt better than she had earlier in the day.

Poe’s consideration for her discomfort, his gentle touch, and encouraging words had all helped ease her mental strife, but physically she was still unsettled. She took his advice and drank a bit more than she had been allowing herself, remembering that they were camped near the branch of two rivers now so water was not scarce, and she slept restlessly most of the afternoon, getting up only to once more change the folded cloths between her legs.

Rose checked on her as night fell, then Poe returned later with a bowl of broth, insisting she drink it, that it would help prevent her from becoming weak and provide her body with more water. She obeyed and actually felt much better afterward. It didn’t hurt that he stayed with her for a while, once more rubbing the back of her neck gently. Rose pulled up the canvas sides just before coming in to sleep, allowing a breeze to come through the wagon and cool things down, and Rey slept much better.

Her cramps were still horrible the next morning, and though the bleeding seemed a little less she was worried that getting up and moving around would make the flow increase once more. She made herself leave the wagon to eat breakfast. It was a cool, foggy morning, and the air felt thick in its stillness. Despite knowing there were hundreds of Indians camped around them, she could not see or hear any of them. The dark shape of the building that housed the trading post was the only thing other than their wagon and animals she could see.

“There’s a priest at the Fort,” Poe said softly after they finished eating. “He’s planning on doing mass tomorrow morning if you all would like to go.”

Rey felt joy break through the pain in her body. “I would love that!”

“Yes!” Rose agreed. “It’s been a while!”

“There are a handful of soldiers that will appreciate it as well,” Poe told them. “I’ll take you to the Fort in the morning. One of the officer’s wives invited us to brunch afterward.”

Rey became worried she wouldn’t feel up to socializing, but she determined to rest as much as possible today. Shortly after they were done eating, while Rey was debating whether or not she wanted to go back into the wagon and try to sleep, Naster’s wife Kimi appeared out of the fog, walking toward them. Rey knew that both Rose and Finn had spent time with the Pawnee woman yesterday, meeting some of the permanent residents that lived outside the Fort, and some of the Indians that were camped there for meetings with government representatives to form a new treaty, but Rey had not had much contact with her.

The woman had a large stone mug cupped in her hands, and Rey could see the steam coming off of it. She walked directly up to Rey, briefly acknowledging the others. She began speaking to Rey, her English perfect.  

“Your friend told me you were having a difficult moon,” she said softly. “In my culture, we separate ourselves during our moon, and our women family and friends take care of us. We do not work or interact with our men or children. I know your culture is different, but I hope you are getting some rest.” She offered the mug to Rey. “This is raspberry leaf tea. It will help with the pain.”

Rey carefully accepted the mug. “Thank you,” she whispered. She was surprised and touched by the woman’s kindness.

Kimi looked at Rose, then back at Rey. “I will crush some more leaves today and send some with you both to use in the future.”

“Thank you, Kimi,” Rose said with a smile.

The Indian woman nodded to them both and turned to leave. Rey took a sip of the hot tea, surprised that it actually tasted decent.

“They separate themselves?” Finn asked quietly. “Like lepers?”

Poe shook his head. “Nothing like that. The Indian women seem to enjoy the break from daily life. The men have to take care of themselves and the children for a few days.” He smirked. “I guarantee you won’t find a ‘civilized’ white man happy to do that for their wives. White women are expected to keep on like nothing is happening. Most tribes consider it a sacred time for women.”

“I like the idea of having a break for a few days every month,” Rose said, giving Rey a side-eye. “What do you say, Rey? Should we let them take care of us and all the chores every time we have our ‘moon’ from now on?”

“Hey!” Finn argued. “I can cook and clean.” He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “But I’m not… you know… gonna wash your… stuff.”

The other three laughed.

The tea did indeed help. Rey was much more comfortable, but at the encouragement of the others, she spent the rest of the day doing very little. Her head was far better, too, but she wondered if that was due to the cooler temperature. She slept well that night, and woke in the morning anxious for mass.

The day started out mostly clear, but there were still lingering traces of the fog from the day before. Poe led them to the Fort, and Rey was able to see more of the Indian encampment as well. The Fort itself was fairly busy, with uniformed soldiers moving about doing their duties, and though the watch towers along the walls of the fort were occupied with men armed with rifles, nobody seemed particularly nervous. Several Indians were inside the walls, escorted by soldiers and civilian men, but once more Rey did not sense there was any animosity among them. The negotiations for the treaty must be going well. As they neared the residential area, they all focused on a huge two-story house, which they were informed was nicknamed Old Bedlam. Some of the single officers lived upstairs, and the Fort headquarters were on the lower level. Poe led them inside the building and towards what he told them was officially the ballroom. Since the on-site chapel was so small, Father Pierre-Jean De Smet had decided to hold mass in the larger room. At least two-dozen men, soldiers and civilians, and a handful of women were already seated in the room.

As Poe led them to some seats toward the back, Rey looked at him curiously. “You’ll join us?”

He gave her a one-shoulder shrug. “I might as well.”

Rey smiled and took her seat next to Rose, who was next to Finn. There were a few glances in their direction, but they seemed curious, nothing more. As Poe sat next to Rey, Rose leaned over to whisper, “I wish we could have had confession first.”

Rey raised an eyebrow and looked at her friend. “You have a mortal sin to confess?” She glanced at Finn, then looked back at Rose, whose cheeks were turning pink.

“Nothing like that!” she hissed. “Just… thoughts.”

Rey gave a quick look at the man sitting next to her, then looked back at Rose. “Me, too.”

They both giggled, then straightened as they heard a man’s voice begin to chant the Alma Redemptoris Mater. The people stood as the Jesuit priest followed a young soldier carrying a crucifix down the center aisle to the makeshift altar set up in the front of the room.

Poe had told them about the priest this morning before they came. Father De Smet was originally from Belgium, but had spent close to thirty years traveling all over the west, giving the first Catholic mass in Wyoming in 1840. He had a good relationship with almost all the Indian tribes and was here to give them encouragement in their negotiations. They called him and the other Jesuit priests Black Robes.

Rey focused on the older man as he began to intone the mass in Latin, the familiar words and chants giving her comfort. How many times had she watched the man she loved as her own father offer the mass in her lifetime? Rey felt her spirits rise as the mass proceeded. She saw the priest focus on them more than once; the fact that she, a white woman, was sitting with three people of different races, two of them men, was noteworthy, she was sure. When the time came for them to come forward for communion, Poe stood to let them pass him. Rey respected his choice, remembering that he had told her he had not practiced the faith for many years.

After mass, Father De Smet found them. It was obvious he remembered Poe, as they had crossed paths more than once through the years, and Poe introduced Rey and the others. “Your adopted father was a priest?” he asked, looking at Rey.

“Yes,” Rey nodded. “He legally adopted Finn, as well. Rose was never officially adopted, but he treated her as a daughter and invited her to come with us to Oregon.”

The priest nodded. “But now you go without him.”

“I believe he’s with us in spirit.”

De Smet smiled. “Yes, I believe so, too.” He looked at Poe. “And your proof is your Guardian Angel here. If anyone can get you to your new home safely, it’s Poe Dameron.”

Rey looked at Poe. “Yes, I believe you are right.”

******

They left Fort Laramie bright and early Monday morning. And it was indeed bright. Daylight was at its longest now, and the sun was fairly far up in the sky and already hot by the time everyone was ready to go. The camps around them, as well as the fort itself, were also active, and many of the people, both Indian and white, watched them go.

They crossed the rather rickety bridge over the Laramie River and continued to head west-northwest, still following the path of the North Platte. The bridge, Poe had learned, had been hastily built just a couple of weeks ago, as the one that had previously stood there had washed out when the spring rains combined with the mountain snowmelt had created a raging river. It was still high and flowing fast, but the bridge was standing solid against the water and they made it across without any problem.

Poe rode BB for the first few hours, knowing the horse had some energy to burn as he had rested like all of them for the past few days. He rode far ahead of the wagon, then back to them a few times. He had no need to hunt for a while, as they still had plenty of jerky from the lost oxen, as well as some fresh vegetables given as a parting gift from Ted and Kimi.

Poe watched Rey closely as the day progressed. She seemed much more comfortable today, her color better, and he could tell she was making an effort to drink more. Poe knew finding water wouldn’t be a problem for the next few weeks, as creeks and lakes would be frequent up through the South Pass, but there would be several dry stretches yet in the future. Storms and rain would also be less frequent as the summer progressed.

Poe also found himself eyeing Rose and Finn more often. Yesterday after mass, the four of them had shared a brunch with a few of the officers and their wives outside in the sunshine. Father De Smet had joined them as well. While the group had been all white, they had not acted uncomfortable around the three non-white guests, and had, in fact, seemed genuinely welcoming to them all. After the meal, Poe had watched Finn and Rose head off with Father De Smet, the three of them talking intently. Today, the couple seemed… different. They were holding hands almost constantly, and giving each other secretive looks and smiles. After the couple wandered off to gather flowers during the noon break, Poe finally asked Rey what was going on.

“They asked Father De Smet to offer them counseling yesterday,” she told him with a shy smile. “Finn proposed and Rose accepted, so Father De Smet gave them a blessing and permission to marry. Essentially, they had their banns announced and they can marry whenever we find a priest to do it, as long as it’s longer than three weeks from yesterday.”

Poe grinned. “So, they’re finally engaged.”

Rey nodded. “Yes.” But then she looked troubled. “You don’t think a priest will deny them, do you? Because of their color?”

Poe shook his head. “Out here? Doubtful. They’re both baptized and now have permission from Father De Smet. I can almost guarantee they won’t be refused.” He sighed. “However, it may be a while before we see another priest.”

“What about Fort Bridger? Won’t there be one there?”

“Well, first of all, priests aren’t assigned to the forts out here,” Poe told her. “They’re on the move all the time, trying to tend to their scattered flock. And second,” he paused. “We aren’t going to Fort Bridger.”

Rey studied him for a while. “The short-cut you were talking about?”

He nodded. “We’ll be heading more north after the South Pass. Fort Bridger is south.”

She nodded. “Easier route but more of a chance of running into Indians, right?”

“Right. And it’s only easier in the summer. It’s pretty rough up there in the winter.”

“So, we’re almost to the mountains?” Rey’s eyes were excited.

“A little over two hundred miles.” He cocked his head at her. “That’s still quite a journey.”

He could almost see her mind working. “Less than three weeks if we don’t run into any problems.”

He smiled and nodded. “Yeah, okay. Let’s pray we don’t run into any problems.”

She grinned.

The first week out of Fort Laramie went very smooth, but it was also becoming very dry, with no rain. Fortunately, the trail kept them fairly close to the river. They traveled in a northwesterly direction, passing Fort Fetterman on the other side of the river one quiet afternoon. They didn’t stop, and though they saw some uniformed riders watching them, the soldiers didn’t cross the river to speak to them. Poe wondered if they had communicated with the Ren caravan and therefore knew who they were and why they were alone.

They came along the remains of Fort Caspar, which had been abandoned the year before. The bridge that allowed them to finally cross the North Platte, the river they had followed for weeks, was still standing and still solid. Poe told the others about a battle that had been fought here between the soldiers and the Lakota and Cheyenne in 1865. The fort had been called Platte Bridge Station at the time, but it was renamed after Caspar Collins, one of the soldiers killed during that battle.

“One of the warriors who led the Indians in the battle was at Fort Laramie when we were there,” Poe told them. “Red Cloud is finally seeking peace.”

Once they crossed the Platte, their path turned almost directly west. The terrain was becoming difficult, with pine covered ridges, plateaus, and rugged ground. All eight of their oxen were being used now, though Poe said there would be plenty of open, flat areas ahead before they got to the real mountains.

On June 27^th, they reached Independence Rock.

“We’re ahead of schedule,” Poe smiled.

“Really?” Rey asked a bit grumpily. “Because to me it feels like we’re moving at a snail’s pace.”

“Independence Rock was given its name because the first wagon trains usually reached it around July 4^th. We’re making good time.”

As it was a Saturday, they set up camp with the knowledge that they would be resting here until Monday, and Rey immediately set out to do laundry on the banks of the Sweetwater River. Because Rose did the majority of the cooking, Rey always tried to do her share by mending and cleaning everyone’s clothing. Poe watched her head across the still green grass for a moment, then he glanced at Rose and Finn, who were, as usual, completely focused on each other while Rose mixed up sourdough. Without letting himself think too much about it, he got up and followed Rey.

Rey set the basket of laundry, which now included some of his clothing, on the bank of the river and sat on the grass. She turned her head to watch him as he moved to sit beside her. “I am fine doing this myself, you know,” she said with a smirk.

“Oh, I know,” Poe nodded. “Just thought you might like company.” He glanced over his shoulder back toward the wagon; he could hear Finn and Rose laughing, but couldn’t see them from this spot. He looked back at Rey. “We’re catching up to the others,” he said softly. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they came into sight in a few days.”

He watched as Rey swallowed and nodded, looking away. “I know.” The fresh cow pies on the trail were hard to miss. “How much farther until South Pass?”

“Over one hundred miles, yet.”

Rey looked troubled, biting her lip. “I don’t…” she sighed. “I don’t want to see him again.”

“I know,” he said softly. “We can hang back. It’s not going to make us late.”

“And when we get to South Pass, we go north, they go south, right?”

“Right.”

“Are you sure?”

He focused on her. “Yes. We discussed the route many times. They have no reason to change it, and no desire to.” He cocked his head. “You do know that I will protect you from him, don’t you? I swear on my life.”

She smiled, her eyes huge as she looked at him. “I know,” she whispered. Then she leaned forward and kissed him softly at the corner of his mouth. She straightened up slowly, as if she didn’t want to move away from him, her eyes once more meeting his.

Ignoring that part of him that had been telling him for weeks to not get close to this woman, physically or emotionally, Poe reached up and cupped the back of her head gently. Then he leaned in to kiss her.

******

Rey had never been kissed before.

Other than brief pecks on her cheek, and one memorable moment when Daniel Linski had kissed her hand at Carol Bannister’s birthday party when she was seventeen, Rey was completely inexperienced when it came to physical intimacy. Not that she hadn’t thought about it. She had often wondered what it would feel like, especially when she was in the presence of a man she thought was attractive. But she had never focused on any one particular person until Poe Dameron.

She had spent an embarrassingly long amount of time staring at his mouth in the past few weeks. Watching him talk or when he was eating, wondering if his lips were as soft as they looked and what would they taste like and would he be gentle or forceful… She would feel excitement with these thoughts, and then would start to think of far more intimate things. Rey knew what sex was, and the mechanics involved in the act. She had watched with clinical curiosity when dogs and horses mated, and assumed people copulated in a similar fashion. However, she had never imagined she would ever enjoy the act, and couldn’t understand how any woman could. But again, Poe had changed her perspective. For the first time, she had thought that maybe, just maybe, she would be okay letting a man have intercourse with her, but only if that man was Poe.

So, when Poe kissed her on the banks of the Sweetwater River in the wilds of Wyoming, Rey wasn’t surprised to feel her curiosity grow along with her excitement. The idea of this man touching her… mating with her… did not disgust her at all. If anything, she was absolutely willing to let him do anything he wanted with her, trusting that he would take care of her. Her subconscious reminded her that sex was something that was supposed to be reserved for marriage, but she shoved the thought away. She was on the frontier, and it was unknown when they would come across another priest; God would surely forgive, especially knowing she was only feeling this way because she was absolutely, irrevocably in love.

His lips were as soft as they looked, and as he pressed into her further, she felt his tongue gently probe her mouth, encouraging her to open for him. She couldn’t refuse, and the touch of his tongue to hers sent a flare of electricity through her body. She hadn’t realized this was something that was done, much less that it would feel so good! He continued to toy with her mouth, his lips and tongue stoking a fire in her that she had never known existed. His hand was on her shoulder, his fingers massaging her through the material of her blouse, and that touch only increased the heady feeling his kiss was creating. She felt a surge of moisture in her nether regions, and she pulled back, embarrassment flooding her.

Poe let her go immediately as she pulled away, her face hot. “I’m sorry,” he breathed. “Did I hurt you?”

Rey shook her head. “No,” she whispered. “Of course not.” She glanced at him, aware he was watching her with concern. “I just…”  She licked her lips, remembering that he already knew so many intimate things about her. “I think I may have started my monthly.” She focused on a blade of grass on the ground.

Poe was silent for a moment, then he asked softly. “Are you due?”

The question caught her off guard. “No,” she told him, then looked at him. “It hasn’t been four weeks since Fort Laramie, has it?”

He shook his head, a contemplative expression on his face. “You… felt like you were starting to bleed?” he asked. “While we were kissing?”

Again, Rey felt embarrassment surge through her. She looked away. “Yes.”

“It’s not your moon, Rey,” he told her, his voice sounding relieved.

She looked at him. “How do you know?”

The corner of his mouth curled up slightly. “I’m sure you know what happens to male animals, and men, when they become sexually aroused?”

Rey felt her cheeks heating again, but instead of looking away, she looked down toward Poe’s crotch. It was quite obvious the bulge she had admittedly noticed previously was larger than normal. She swallowed and looked away quickly. “Yes,” she said with a rush, then cleared her throat.

“Well, the same thing can happen to women, just in a different way.”

Rey looked at him, surprised. “You mean…not blood?”

He shook his head. “No. It’s not blood. But it is your body’s way of… preparing itself.” He cocked his head. “Many women never feel arousal. Wives just let their husbands get on with it and get it done, and women like Rose’s mother used assistance to make things more comfortable.”

Rey suddenly remembered overhearing a conversation between two women who worked as cooks at the orphanage, Lily and Nora. They had both been prostitutes like Rose’s mother before Father Luke had offered them safer and better paying jobs. They had been joking about the huge bottle of Olive oil used for cooking. “What I would have given for a bottle like that back in the day!” one had laughed.

Rey shifted her weight and looked at Poe again, her curiosity overcoming her discomfiture. “So… our kissing made me..?”

Poe nodded, a teasing smile on his lips. “Yep.” He cocked his head at her. “Obviously, you’ve never touched yourself.”

“What?”

He laughed softly. “Touched yourself,” he repeated. “Between your legs. In pleasure.”

She swallowed. “Uh, no.”

“You may want to experiment with that,” he said, “Find what you like, and then,” he paused.

“Then?” Rey breathed.

“Don’t settle for any man who doesn’t make you feel that way or better.”

Rey stared at him for a long moment. Lifting her chin up, she asked, “If I can make myself feel good, then why do I need a man?”

Poe’s eyes lit up and he pulled back, laughing. Rey had to bite her lip to keep from joining him. He finally caught his breath and focused on her. “That is a very good question,” he told her. “But if you want babies, you’re going to need a man. Or you could just adopt a bunch like your father, I guess.” He shrugged, his eyes still dancing with laughter.

Rey finally let herself smile back at him. “I want babies,” she said. “But I think it’s too late for me.”

“Bullshit,” he rasped. “Philly society may consider you an ‘old maid’ by twenty-two, but out here you are still very eligible.”

Laughter from over the hill behind them caught her attention, and Rey remembered why she had come to the water in the first place. She moved up on her knees, reaching for the basket of clothing. “I should finish these before supper is ready.”

She glanced back at Poe just in time to see him nod and push himself to his feet. “Yeah,” he said softly. “I apologize for being too forward, Miss Skywalker,” he said softly. “It won’t happen again.” He turned to walk away.

Rey sat up straight. “Poe!”

He stopped and looked at her, one eyebrow raised.

She licked her lips, then smirked. “I hope it does happen again.” The expression on his face made her smile grow. She turned back to the clothing, grabbing up the small bar of lye and bringing it and one of Finn’s shirts to the water and began scrubbing. It took a moment, but she soon heard him walk away.

That night, after the sun had set and the heat of the day had finally subsided, as she lay next to Rose on the old thin mattress they used as a bed in the wagon, her mind once more ran over what had happened at the river. She turned on her side and whispered, “Rose?” Knowing the men were right under the wagon and the sides of the canvas were up to allow the breeze in, she kept her voice very quiet. “Can I ask you a question?”

Rose sighed and turned to face her, her eyes half shut. “What?”

“Have you and Finn… you know?”

Rose’s eyes popped open all the way. “What?” she gasped softly.

Rey bit her lip, but pushed on. “How far have you and Finn gone? Intimately?”

Rose blinked at her in the dark, then she shifted uncomfortably. “Well… we haven’t… we’ve touched. A lot of kissing. We haven’t actually…” she shrugged.

“Have you… become aroused?” Rey whispered. “Have you… felt wet. Between your legs?”

Rose was quiet for a moment. “Yes,” she finally said. “Have you?”

Rey nodded. “Yes.”

Suddenly, they were both giggling. “Shhhhhh,” they told each other, which only made them laugh harder.

“What are you two doing up there?” Finn asked loudly.

“Nothing!” Rose answered. “Just talking.”

“About what, exactly?” Poe pushed, and Rey could swear she could hear a smile in his voice.

“Never you mind!” Rey said. “It’s women’s talk!”

“We’re going to sleep now!” Rose told them. “Goodnight!” She reached out and grabbed Rey’s hand. “He’s going to marry you,” she said softly. “I’m sure of it!”

Rey felt her heart squeeze. “I don’t know, Rose,” she argued. “But I hope so.”

******

Two days past Independence Rock, the Ren wagon train came into sight. The rolling hills and bluffs kept them from view most of the time, but Poe could see Rey’s tension as she realized how close they were coming. Poe knew it wasn’t because their oxen were faster than the others, but that because they didn’t have to wait on other people, they naturally got started earlier in the mornings, and took shorter breaks during the day. When they made camp that night, they could see the fires from the caravan ahead of them.

“Let’s stay here for a day,” Poe suggested. “Let them increase the distance between us.” It was hard to miss Rey’s relieved expression, but she also looked worriedly at Rose and Finn. He shrugged as the couple looked back and forth between them. “We’re about a week away from the South Pass, and then we won’t have to worry about them anymore. We can afford to relax a couple extra days in the meantime.”

They were still near the Sweetwater River, so water wasn’t an issue, even with the fact that it hadn’t rained in over a week. And there was plenty of grass for the oxen to graze on. Poe even let Rey ride out on her own with BB for a short while; she rode a large circle toward the east, away from the direction of the Ren wagons. Just in case. They carried on the next day, much more relaxed and refreshed; having an extra day off was certainly not a problem for any of them.

The day was extraordinarily hot, and Poe almost regretted that they hadn’t stayed in camp one more day. They took a longer break than normal mid-day, and stopped earlier, as the oxen were panting heavily. Even after the sun set, the temperature remained abnormally warm. Poe and Finn made sure the oxen were allowed to wade out into the river while they drank and didn’t bring them back in to the wagon until they had stopped panting.

The next day, they came upon a disturbing sight. Five oxen, which Poe recognized as being from the Ren train, lay dead. It was apparent by the cold firepits and the area of flattened grass that this had been a campsite. But why had so many oxen died overnight here? Poe dismounted and handed BB’s reins to Rey as he carefully walked over to the dead animals. There were no signs that they had been shot, and two were still sternal, as if they had simply passed away in their sleep, their heads dropped to the ground.  

“Heat exhaustion,” Poe muttered. “They weren’t able to cool down last night. They were probably allowed to drink, then brought back here for the night.” Poe looked over at Rey, who was frowning sadly at the bodies. “They can’t sweat like horses can.”

“Wouldn’t the guides have known what to do?” Rose said, her voice angry. “You did.”

Poe shrugged. He thought Bill and Mike should have known. Hell, Ren had done this more than once; he should have known. “Maybe they were distracted.” He looked around. They were surrounded by sandstone bluffs of various sizes. “Maybe they saw something and wanted to get the oxen safely into the circle before nightfall.”

“Poor things,” Rey whispered as Poe came back to her, taking BB’s reins from her. They continued on, their mood bleak.

After they made camp, clouds moved in, and shortly after nightfall, lightning lit up the sky to the west, a cool breeze blowing ahead of the storm. There was no worry about it not cooling off tonight. The rain came, but it was short-lived. Poe made sure the oxen and BB were tied tightly, remembering the last time a night storm had hit after they had left the train, but there was only rain and a bit of wind this time, though the lightning and thunder were almost constant.

Poe determined the next morning, a Saturday, that it wouldn’t hurt to stay in camp for the weekend. Despite the storm, the heat was returning and he figured the Ren train had been slowed by their loss of oxen. Poe headed out early the next morning to scout out the area on BB. As he traveled a couple of miles north of their position, he found fresh horse droppings. And they were not in one spot, but scattered, indicating the horse was being ridden and had defecated while moving. Wild horses wouldn’t bother; they would stand still to leave a pile. Suddenly, he realized what had spooked the others and made them rush to get the cattle in the safety of the circle without waiting for them to cool down.

They were being watched.

But by who? Indians, he was sure, but which tribe? Were they anyone he knew, or were he and his group in potential danger? If the watchers weren’t friendly, then he and his companions were more likely to be a target, as they essentially had no protection. But if the watchers recognized him, knowing he was a friend, they should be safe…

He rode back to the wagon at a swift but not rushed pace, trying to tell himself he wasn’t worried. But the relief he felt upon seeing his three friends sitting in the shade playing some kind of card game was extreme. These people, he knew, had become far more than an assignment to him. Finn had become a friend and confidant, Rose felt like a little sister, and Rey… Well, even though his logical mind told him she could be nothing more than a friend, deep down he couldn’t help but wish for something far more.

When they settled to eat their noon meal, Poe told them what he had seen.

“Do you think we’re in danger?” Rey asked quietly.

Poe shook his head. “I can’t imagine they wouldn’t have done something by now if they didn’t want us here. I think they are just watching, probably the caravan more than us. We’re not a threat, and they have seen countless people pass by through the years.”

“And if they recognized you?” Finn asked.

Again, Poe shrugged. “Then maybe we’ll get invited to dinner?”

They laughed, as Poe had hoped they would.

“Just keep alert and don’t anyone go off alone,” he told them.

On Monday morning, they headed out once more. Their oxen were rested, and while the days were still hot, the nights seemed to cool off better. Late that morning, Poe pointed ahead of them. Just barely visible on the horizon lay a barrier of white. “There they are,” he told them.  

The Rocky Mountains were just ahead.

******