Life Day Celebration 2022 -Damerey Edition - Part One

A fellow Star Wars fan on Tumblr created this challenge. One short story with a Life Day prompt for every day in December. Of course, all of mine will be Damerey.

December 1 - Family

Rey Skywalker entered the large meeting tent and stopped, eyes wide as she looked around. The whole space had been decorated with colorful lights and garland and boughs of various types of evergreen trees. The scent of those trees combined with the amazing aroma of something baking, and candles that smelled of cinnamon and vanilla burned, adding to the pleasant and warm atmosphere.

A small group of people gathered around the table off to the side of the room, all of them with a drink of some sort in their hand and smiles on their faces. All those faces turned to her as she entered.

“Happy Life Day!” they shouted. Finn, Poe, Rose, Chewie, Beau, Kaydell, Junior, Larma, Wrobie, Klaud, and of course BB-8 and D-O.

While it wasn’t Rey’s first Life Day, the previous one had been a simple affair, as the war was still ongoing and time and supplies had been limited. But now the war was over, and while there were a few important faces missing in this little group, they were not forgotten. These people were her friends, her coworkers, her fellow soldiers.

This was her family.

Poe walked up to her, handing her a glass of spotchka. His smile was soft and his eyes were warm. He glanced up. “Oh, look,” he said, sarcasm heavy in his voice. “We’re under the mistletoe.”

Rey looked up. “Imagine that,” she said softly. Then she looked back at Poe.

“Happy Life Day, Rey,” he whispered, leaning in.

“Happy Life Day, Poe,” she said, just before her lips touched his.

December 2 - Home

Poe rushed through the procedures to shut down the ship, anxious to exit the X-Wing. He looked around the hanger as he did so, not surprised to find it mostly empty. The big Life Day Celebration was going on in the mess, and all but a skeleton crew would be here. He clambered out of the fighter, watching as BB-8 lowered himself down to the hanger floor.

“Okay, buddy,” he told his droid. “You better get to the mess and join up with the others. I’m gonna go shower and change and then get there myself.”

The little ball droid beeped an affirmative, the rolled off in the opposite direction Poe headed. He didn’t run, but he did walk quickly toward his quarters. It felt odd being assigned to a big cruiser like this again. The last one he had been on as an officer and pilot had been the Raddus. He had so many good memories, and bad, of that ship. But this New Republic cruiser, the Organa, was larger and prettier and named after the most amazing person he would ever know.

Not including his wife, of course.

He hopped on the turbolift that would take him to his floor of his quarters, then quickly strode down the hall to his door. He punched in the code and quickly stepped through the door, only to stop short as he saw his wife laying on the bed, her back to him. She should be at the party.

“Rey?” He wasn’t ashamed of the squeak in his voice as concern took over excitement. He rushed over to the bed.

She turned her head to look at him, and he could tell she had been crying.

“Kriff, Rey! What happened?” He sat on the edge of the bed, grasping her shoulders and helping her sit up.

She was shaking her head. “It’s okay. I’ve just got a raging migraine.”

Rey’s migraines had started shortly after the Battle of Exegol. Both she and Poe had believed them to be an aftereffect of her defeat of the Emperor and her resulting death. No medicine helped and even meditating in the Force did not seem to ease the pain. Fortunately, they were becoming less and less common as time went on, and there was hope that they would eventually cease all together.

“That’s not okay,” Poe argued with Rey’s statement. “Have you taken a sedative?” Sleeping through them was the only thing Rey could really do, and she needed help to do that.

Rey looked at him, her beautiful eyes bloodshot and watery. “I’m afraid to take one,” she whispered.

Poe felt his gut clench. They had found out just last week that Rey was pregnant. He nodded, understanding why she didn’t want to take the powerful drug.

Rey touched his shoulder. “You go to the party,” she said. “I’ll just keep trying to sleep.”

Poe shook his head. “Nope.” He stood up and started removing his flight suit. “I’m staying with you.”

“Poe,” Rey immediately started arguing. “The party is following Yavin traditions this year. You need to go and remember home.”

Poe snorted, pulling off his boots and shucking his pants, leaving him in nothing but his undershirt and boxers. “Haven’t you figured it out yet, Sunshine. You are my home. I’m staying with you.”

With tears once more in her eyes, this time not from pain, Rey turned again, letting Poe slide into the bed behind her. He wrapped his arm around her waist and brought his mouth up against the back of her neck, softly kissing and nuzzling her, trying his best to help her forget about the pain so she could rest.

Within minutes, they were both asleep.

December 3 - Uneti Tree

Poe lay on his back in the shade of the Uneti Tree, staring up at the branches swaying above him in the gentle breeze. Suddenly, a spindly little human arm appeared in his line of sight. Snorting in amusement, Poe called up toward the top of the tree. “You better hope your mother doesn’t catch you up there!”

A little face surrounded by a mop of dark curly hair peered down at him from the same branch the little arm had come from. “Mama knows,” was the response.

Poe’s eyebrows went up. “She does, does she?”

There was a brief pause. “Well, wouldn’t the tree tell her?”

Poe frowned. “I don’t think it works like that, Tem. I think she could feel if something happened to this tree that hurt it or made it very happy, but I don’t think it can tattle on you.”

“He’s right,” said a voice off to his left. He turned to see Rey walking toward them, little Leia walking along beside her holding her hand. “The tree can’t tattle, but your sister can.”

As Leia let go of her mother’s hand and ran toward her father, Rey stopped and looked up at Tem. “Please come down from there. Slowly.”

Poe sat up and caught Leia as she dived at him, giggling. “Did you tell on your brother?” he asked as he started tickling her.

“Yes!” Leia squealed, her laughter getting louder as the tickling continued.

“That’s the last time I ever tell her what I’m doing,” Tem grumbled as he slowly clambered down through the branches. He finally got low enough he was able to jump to the ground, but even that distance was too much, and he fell to his knees. Blushing, he stood and dusted off his pants.

Leia had quieted in Poe’s arms and sat looking at her brother, her hazel eyes huge. “Sorry, Tem. But Mama asked, and Papa says to always tell the truth.”

“That’s right,” Poe nodded, giving his daughter a quick kiss on the cheek.

Rey kneeled next to her husband and daughter, motioning for Tem to join them. “You know why I don’t want you climbing this tree, don’t you?”

“Because it’s special?” Tem answered, his voice wary. He plopped down between his parents.

“Yes, it is special,” Rey confirmed. “It’s also very, very rare. There are only a handful of trees like this one left in the galaxy.” She paused. “Your grandfather and I tried our best to make sure the Uneti lives on by spreading out those saplings to as many safe planets as we could, but none of them are completely safe. Grandpapa Kes has taken care of this one since it was planted, and it is still the oldest Uneti tree that I know of. We need to respect and care for it, not use it as a toy. Okay?”

Tem nodded. “Okay.”

Rey leaned forward and planted a kiss on her son’s forehead. He winced as if he didn’t like the action, but the smile on his face betrayed how he really felt.

Poe grinned, then winked at Rey. “Now, can I get back to my nap?”

“I think a nap sounds like a grand idea,” Rey answered.

With more than a few giggles and grunts, the four of them settled down in the shade of the Uneti Tree, Rey’s head pillowed on Poe’s chest, sharing the space with Leia, Tem’s head resting on her shoulder.

As uncomfortable as he knew this pile would eventually become, Poe couldn’t help feeling more content than he had ever felt in his life. This was the best Life Day ever. Smiling up at the leaves above him, he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

December 4 - Presents/ce

Rey looked askance at the colorfully wrapped box sitting next to the bed. Though she had known about Life Day back on Jakku, she had never celebrated it, and just last week both she and Finn (who had also never celebrated it) had learned about the tradition of giving gifts. Leia had let her know that those who wanted to participate in the secret gift exchange needed to have their gift ready by today, but there had been no pressure to take part in it.

Finn had been excited by the prospect, and his enthusiasm had spread to Rey, so she had agreed to do it as well. However, after she drew the name of the person she was supposed to find a gift for, she had regretted her hasty decision.

What the heck was she supposed to get for Poe Dameron?

Almost immediately after drawing his name, Rey wanted to go to Finn and ask to switch. Finn knew Poe much better than she did, as they were the best of friends, but that almost felt like cheating. She could at least ask Finn for help, couldn’t she? Or Snap. Or Karè. Someone who knew him better than she did. But something held her back. If she looked closely at herself, she knew it was just her stubborn independence that kept her from seeking help.

She spent three almost sleepless nights trying to come up with something. Something simple. It didn’t have to be meaningful, did it? It was the thought that counts, after all. It was while she was eating dinner one evening, sitting with several of the others around the fire pit, that her eye caught on something that gave her the answer. The firelight was glinting off of something around Poe’s neck.

She had noticed that he wore a chain around his neck, and had even asked Finn about it, wondering if he wore ‘dog tags’ or some other identification. Finn had told her that what Poe wore was much more important that an ID; he wore his late mother’s wedding ring. He had been very close to his mother, Finn explained, and his father had given Poe the ring after her death.

Rey suddenly knew exactly what to get Poe for Life Day.

But now, as the dinner where everyone was to exchange gifts drew closer, she wondered if she had made a mistake. It was too personal, she thought. He would know she had asked about him. About the ring. She didn’t want him thinking she was overly curious about him, possibly even fixated on him. Because she wasn’t.

Was she?

He was handsome, she had to admit. He was funny. Smart. Confident but supportive of everyone around him. He was Leia’s second in command for a reason. And sometimes she caught him looking at her with an intensity that would unsettle her if it had been anyone else. He would always look away quickly when he realized she had noticed him staring, as if he was embarrassed, and she found that rather interesting. She trusted him and she did want to know more about him, but she didn’t know how to go about it without embarrassing herself.

So, maybe this was the way to open that door between them. Give him the gift and hope he didn’t take it the wrong way.

The opening of presents began right after dinner. One by one, names were drawn, and that person would open their present. The person who had gifted it would then step forward and either receive sincere thanks or some joking would go one, depending on the gift and the people involved. Rey’s name was called before Poe’s, and she had a brief moment of panic. She had never even given a thought to her present. Cautiously, she opened the small box, pleased when she found a strip of beautiful, soft tanned leather. She had been telling Finn she wanted to make some new arm cuffs. Therefore, she wasn’t at all surprised when Finn stepped forward.

“It’s Runyip leather,” he told her. “Just like the jacket.” He grinned, adjusting the leather jacket Poe had given him on his shoulders.

Rey grinned back. Finn had loaned her that jacket more than once, joking that it was ‘the family jacket.’

“Thank you, Finn,” she said, genuinely touched he had remembered her comment about the cuffs. But her whole body stiffened as Poe’s name was called next.

She watched the pilot accept the small wrapped package from C-3PO (who had insisted on MCing the event). He looked at it curiously, shook it softly, then started opening it. His eyes widened as he carefully removed the silver chain from its nest of onion-skin paper. He looked around the room, his expression confused.

Taking a deep breath, Rey stood. “I know how important that ring is, and I felt like the chain you are using is just too fragile to keep something so special safe.” She shrugged as Poe’s eyes focused on her. “I worry it will break.” She gestured to the chain hanging from his fingers. “It has Beskar in it. I would wager it’s almost unbreakable.”

“Beskar?” Poe gasped. “How?”

Rey smiled softly. “A scavenger never gives up their most profitable site.”

Poe laughed, then looked back down at the chain. He nodded his head and blinked rapidly before looking back at her, his eyes soft.

“Thank you, Rey. Thank you.”

December 5 - Holiday

“What do you mean you can’t come because you’re working?” he asked her. “It’s Christmas Eve! No one should have to work a holiday.”

Rey had just started dating Poe Dameron two short months ago. They had met thanks to their mutual friend, Finn, and while things had been going well in their relationship so far, and Rey was exceedingly happy to have finally found someone who actually seemed to ‘get her,’ she knew there would be bumps in the road. Apparently, this was the first one.

“I agree no one should work on holidays when you’re talking about retail or service industries, but some jobs are necessary all the time,” Rey argued. She hated that this conversation was happening over the phone. She would really like to see his expressive face right now, to know what he was thinking.

“Well, of course!” Poe countered. “Hospitals and cops and firefighters and such,” he continued. “They are needed and are hopefully getting extra pay for their service.” He paused. “But Rey, you work for a bank. Why are you working Christmas Eve?”

Rey smiled. There was a bit of a whine in his voice. “I’m not working my regular job,” she told him. “I’m volunteering at the local animal shelter.”

The other end of the line was silent, so after a moment, Rey continued.

“I’m volunteering to feed and clean that night so that the regular staff and other volunteers can have the night off to be with their families. I’ve always done it over holidays since I don’t have family of my own. I had already signed up to do it this year before we started dating and I didn’t bother changing it because I didn’t know if you even celebrated Christmas or not.”

“Well, yeah,” Poe answered her non-question. “Dad and I have always had a traditional Christmas Eve. Dinner followed by presents.” He sighed. “I was really getting excited about the thought of you joining us. I think he was, too.”

“I’m sorry, Poe,” Rey said, and she truly was. “I should be done by eight, if you guys want to do it a little later than normal?” She paused. “Or you could come with me and we could get done sooner..?”

“I… I wouldn’t know what to do. I’d just be in your way.” He sounded surprised but not upset. And he hadn’t said ‘no.’

“It’s not that difficult. I’ve done it so much I could do it in my sleep. It would be easy to direct you.” She bit her lip before adding, “and I know you’d love to love on all those dogs and cats.”

He huffed a laugh. One of the things that had helped them bond was their shared love of animals. Poe’s dog BB had solidified that bond by attaching himself to Rey more than any other woman Poe had dated. Or so he said. “Are you sure?” he asked, his voice still uncertain.

“Poe, I would love to spend Christmas Eve with you, even if it means cleaning cat litter boxes and scooping dog poop.”

His responding laughter made her smile. Oh, how she loved to hear him laugh!

“Okay,” he finally said. “I’ll do it. I’ll just let Dad know we’ll be a little later than normal.”

Rey’s heart thumped hard a couple of times in her chest. She was more sure than ever that she was falling in love with this man. “Thank you, Poe,” she said softly. “For inviting me to be a part of your traditions and for your help.”

“Thank you, Rey,” he responded. “For letting me be a part of your holiday traditions, too.”

This just might be the best Christmas ever.

December 6 - Past

Poe Dameron jerked awake, sitting up in his bed, sweating heavily despite his bare chest. He took a deep breath, trying to focus on what was real. He was in his tent on Ajan Kloss. It was raining outside, which was typical, and it was warm without being hot. It was a very different environment from a transport in space, where his nightmare had taken place.

Oh, call it what it is, he chastised himself. It hadn’t been a nightmare. It had been a memory.

It wasn’t the first time he had dreamed of being aboard the ‘life pod’ shuttle, cruising away from the Raddus and toward Crait, and watching the other transports blow up, one after another, all because of him.

He squeezed his eyes shut, pushing back the tears that threatened. The self-hatred he had been slowly overcoming swept over him once more, and his chest spasmed painfully as his anxiety shot up. A familiar mantra began rolling through his brain.

What if he had trusted Holdo? What if he had not been so hot-headed? What if he had not sent Finn and Rose on that suicide mission? What if he had kept his ‘head out of his cockpit’ and been more patient?

What if? What if? What if?

“Stop,” said a soft voice from behind him. A warm hand grasped his shoulder lightly, and the touch made him shiver. “No more ‘what ifs’ tonight,” Rey whispered.

How much had he been saying aloud, he wondered? He knew she couldn’t read his mind, and even if she could, she wouldn’t do so. But she could feel his emotions, and he was sure the same panic and dread that had awakened him had woken her as well. They were still getting used to sharing quarters, sharing a bed. This was the first nightmare he had experienced since she moved in with him.

He took another deep breath, then cleared his throat. “I’m okay,” he croaked.

She was silent for a long time, then he felt her hand slide down his arm, grasping his elbow lightly. She kissed the back of his shoulder, then lay her head against it. He could feel his pulse slow and the anxiety lessened. Just having her near, feeling her presence, calmed him.

“What if I hadn’t allowed myself to be caught by the First Order?” Rey said suddenly.

Poe tensed once more.

“What if I hadn’t stupidly thought I could turn Kylo Ren and had instead stayed with Chewie and the Falcon? What if we had been there to help protect the transports, to see them all safely to Crait? How many more would still be alive?”

He sighed, knowing what she was doing. “You didn’t know,” he answered her. “You were doing what you thought was the right thing at the time.”

“Hmmmm,” she hummed, and he could feel her smile against his bare shoulder. “The past is the past, Poe. We both know we can’t change it. But I do think we’ve both learned from it, and are better people because of it.” She paused. “You know that Leia is grooming you to take her place, and she wouldn’t be doing that if she didn’t think you were worthy. Just as she wouldn’t be taking so much time to train me, even though I still think every day that I’m never going to be good enough to be a Jedi. Either she’s gone senile or she knows us better than we know ourselves.”

Poe smiled. “I trust her.”

“So do I,” Rey responded.

Poe finally turned to look at her, cupping her face in his hand as she lifted it from his shoulder. “You are going to be an amazing Jedi,” he told her.

“And you are already an amazing leader,” she replied.

He leaned in and kissed her.

Squeezing his shoulder gently once more, she whispered, “Let’s get back to sleep.”

He nodded, and they both lay back down. Rey stayed curled up next to him as he put his arm around her shoulders. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that the nightmare would return. But not tonight. Tonight, his Rey had chased the demons away and he would sleep well.

“I love you, Kuutamo,” Rey mumbled, already half asleep.

“And I love you, Sunshine.”

December 7 - Present

“Everyone has a past. Memories, both good and bad. And everyone looks ahead to the future. Some with hope, some with fear. But in order to fully be in harmony with the Force, you must learn to live in the present.”

Poe watched as Rey talked to the small group of young children. They were her students. All of them were Force sensitive to some degree, but not all of them would become Jedi. However, Rey wasn’t concerned with how many Jedi she could train, as she felt that even those with minimal awareness could benefit from her teaching. The more people that were receptive to their own natural bond with the Force the more balance there would be in the galaxy. Or so she hoped.

“I’m going to ask you to do a few things for me, but they aren’t going to be physical things. I want you all to make yourselves as comfortable as possible. Don’t sit with your legs scrunched up underneath you if you know they’ll get sore after a while. Find a position you could fall asleep in.” She paused, then gave them a wry smile. “But don’t fall asleep!”

The children giggled, and Poe smiled as well. She was so good with them, he thought. There wasn’t one kid here who didn’t love her. Of course, he wasn’t one to talk. He was hopelessly in love with her, too.

“Now, I want you all to close your eyes and take a deep breath.” Poe had already done this exercise with Rey, so instead of doing as she asked, he watched the children, curious to see how they would handle this task. “Now, open your eyes and look around you. Really look. What do you see? Grass? Trees? Are the trees all the same? How are they different? Is the sun shining? Do the trees have shadows? Look at the sky. Do you see any clouds?”

Poe watched as the children looked about them, eyes wide, mouths open, expressions focused.

“Now that you’re aware of your surroundings, it’s time to look internally. Think about something you’re grateful for.” While she spoke, Rey looked toward him, as soft smile on her lips.

He winked at her.

Her smile grew, but she quickly collected herself and looked back at her students. “After you find something to be thankful for, I want you to think about something in your life that didn’t go the way you wanted it to. Did you not get desert the other night, or get to stay up late? That book or toy you wanted, the one you didn’t get. Do you feel that tension rising up inside you? That resentment? Push it away. Be as grateful for what you don’t have as you are for what you do have. Learn to let go of how you think things should be and accept them for what they are. You cannot control everything that happens around you, no matter how powerful you are in the Force. Sometimes life is going to be different than how you want it to be, and you need to accept that.”

Poe nodded to himself. It was a hard lesson to learn, but in order to create wise, selfless, and compassionate Jedi, these children needed to learn early how to focus on the now, not the ‘what ifs.’ He himself was still learning how to do this.

Rey was silent for a while, letting her students think about what she had said. Though he couldn’t feel their emotions, he knew she could, and her relaxed expression told him she was sensing good things from these kids.

“Congratulations,” she said softly to her class. “You all just learned how to meditate.”

A few of the children smiled and glanced at each other. A couple of the younger ones looked at her with astonishment, as if they had just won a prize.

“Now, I want you all to do what we just did every day. You can either find a friend and do it together, or you can find a quiet place by yourself and do it alone. But I want you to spend a minimum of ten minutes every day meditating. Longer, if you can. And I think you will want to do it longer the more you do it.” She stood from where she was sitting on the ground. “And I want you all to practice mindfulness all the time. Remind each other, if you have to. Focus on everything you do and try not to multitask. One thing at a time. There is no rush here. And if ever you are having trouble focusing or have any questions, please come talk to me or Finn.”

She gave them another smile. “That’s it for today. Go have lunch and take the rest of the afternoon for yourselves.”

A happy gasp emanated from the kids. Most had come from strict school settings, so having an afternoon off was a treat, even when they enjoyed their current classwork. School was school.

What the children didn’t know was that they were getting the rest if the day off because it was their teacher’s wedding anniversary.

As the children scattered, heading off toward the mess or to the residential area where their families or guardians lived, Rey walked toward him.

“So, General,” she said, her voice now far removed from the tone she used with the children. “What are your plans for the rest of the day?”

Poe opened his arms and she stepped right into them, bringing her own arms up around his neck.

“I have very special plans, Master Jedi,” he told her, his own voice low and husky. “Plans where I fully intend to live in the present and focus on one thing at a time.” He brought his lips to hers. “No rushing,” he whispered.

“I’m glad to see you’re so mindful,” she breathed in return.

“I had an excellent teacher.”

December 8 - Future

Mature Content

Rey had been meditating for almost an hour when the vision came.

Visions were rare, and more often than not they were unsettling, but she let them come because she knew they were important to her training. They were visions of the future, Leia told her. But she had to remember that the future was not set, and that she couldn’t depend on these visions to foresee her fate. While some of these visions might come true, most would not, if only because she was aware of what might happen and was able to prevent it, either consciously or unconsciously. Many of her visions included lightsaber duels with Kylo Ren, and a few truly disturbing visions brought nightmarish images of one or more of her friends suffering or dying.

Today’s vision was not like anything she had ever had before.

She was in a unfamiliar setting. It was outside, of that she was sure, and she had a sense that she had never been there before. There was green, a lot of it, and the sound of running water. It was very warm, and she knew this because she was unclothed and not at all cold. Despite the heat, she shivered as she felt the touch of hand on her bare back. Fingers trailed up her spine, then swept back down. She heard herself gasp.

The vision transitioned and she found herself on her back, the grass soft underneath her. The weight of another person was on top of her, but she felt no discomfort. In fact, she felt amazing. Her whole body was tingling, and her heart was racing in excitement. A strange pressure was building between her legs and she ached for more of it. She arched her hips upward, pushing against the weight on top of her. It was a man, she thought. He was as naked as she, his heated skin pressed tightly against hers. It felt marvelous, but she wanted more.

She felt his breath on her neck, and then his mouth. His tongue, warm and wet, laved her throat. She moaned. His hand was on her bare breast, kneading it gently. Again, she arched, begging for more. More of what, she didn’t know. But she was certain he could give it to her.

Suddenly, the pressure between her legs changed as he penetrated her most private area. The fullness was shocking yet familiar. Rey had never been intimate with a man, but in the vision it wasn’t new. This was her lover, and he was well-known to her.

But who was he?

Rey tried to control the vision, but already knew it was impossible. It wasn’t a dream, after all. It was the future. A future that may or may not happen.

Suddenly, the man on top of her pushed his upper body off of her, bracing himself on his arms above her, and she found herself staring up into the intense brown eyes of Poe Dameron.

Her heart racing, Rey pulled herself out of the vision.

Poe?

How could it be? The man had never looked at her as anything but a colleague, an ally. They were barely even friends, despite sharing a bond with both Finn and BB-8. It didn’t matter that Rey always felt something different when she was around him. That she felt self-conscious and immediately started wondering how she looked and smelled when she was in his presence, something she never concerned herself with when around others. She wanted him to like her, to notice her, but he never treated her any different than any of the other fighters under his command. She may have a bit more status due to her being a Jedi-in-training, but otherwise she was nothing special to him.

Then why was the Force telling her they could possibly be much, much more?

Unless she was just a fling? She shook her head, her brain shutting down that idea immediately. Poe Dameron didn’t do flings. If there was one thing she was sure about him, it was that he took his relationships seriously. He was compassionate and loyal and encouraging and protective and…

Rey took a deep breath and lowered her face into her hands, rubbing her temples after a moment.

The fact was, she liked him a lot more than he liked her.

“Hey!”

The soft greeting startled her, and she turned her head to find the subject of her thoughts standing a short distance away.

“Sorry to bother you,” Poe told her, his expression apologetic. “I’m about ready to head out with Snap and Karè on a supply run and wanted to ask if you would look out for Beebs?”

BB8. Their shared ‘child,’ she though sarcastically. “Or course,” she answered, her voice rough. “BB’s always welcome to keep me company.”

The ball droid squealed happily as he rolled out from behind Poe, and Rey gave him a genuine smile. She looked back up at Poe, who was watching her, his expression serious.

In fact, the intensity in his eyes was akin to what she had seen from him in her vision.

She shivered and her skin began tingling.

Poe blinked suddenly. He cleared his throat as he looked away. “Great. I shouldn’t be long.” He nodded, but wouldn’t meet her eyes. His whole demeanor screamed panic.

Rey frowned. “Okay,” she said softly.

He nodded again and turned away from her.

“Poe?”

He stopped, looking back at her. “Yeah?”

“Be careful.”

His expression changed. Gone was the intensity from earlier. Gone was the nervousness she had sensed before he turned away. Instead, a soft warmth filled his beautiful eyes. “I will.” He glanced at his droid, then looked at her again, the corner of his mouth quirking up. Then he turned again and walked away.

BB8 trilled a short little song.

Rey looked at the droid, surprised. “What do you mean he wants you to look out for me? I thought I was looking out for you?”

BB8 gave a short little ‘snort.’

Rey looked back toward the pilot’s retreating back. Most of her visions wouldn’t come to pass, she knew.

But she truly hoped this one would.

December 9 - Remembrance

Mirrin Prime wasn’t a particularly special world. Like thousands of habitable planets, it consisted of various ecosystems, including mountain ranges, oceans, deserts, and steppes. It’s oxygen rich atmosphere and moderate gravity made it perfect for those sentients that survived best in that environment, which included more than 90% of known intelligent species in the galaxy. It had in its past been home to both a Rebel Base and a New Republic base, and now was the official home of the newly restored Republic.

It had been the last base Poe Dameron had been assigned to before he left the New Republic and he hadn’t been back since then, but the event that had been held here earlier today was something he refused to miss.

He stood looking up at the impressive but modest memorial. Made of granite, it stood about three meters tall and was in the shape of the primary tower from the palace in Aldera. It was dedicated to Leia Organa. Her name was centered in large letters about half-way up the tower. Lower down, in slightly smaller print, were the names of her husband and son.

Poe stared at Ben Solo’s name for a long time, resentment competing with understanding. He knew why Ben’s name had been included on this memorial. Most of the galaxy had no clue Leia’s only child had become Kylo Ren. Most believed he had died with several other young Jedi when Luke Skywalker’s temple had been destroyed on Ossus years ago by Kylo Ren. Those that did know had either died during the war or had chosen to remain silent on the subject. It didn’t really matter now, did it?

He took a deep breath and looked back up at Leia’s name. She would have wanted it this way, he thought. As much as she knew Kylo Ren had to be defeated, she had still loved her son. And according to Rey, it was her love for her son that had helped in that defeat. Rey had seen the change in him at the moment Leia died, and he had later given his own life for Rey’s on Exegol.

It was the latter action that made Poe keep his silence about the true identity of Kylo Ren, and only that action. He would never forgive the man. And Rey would never ask him to.

He felt a person come up behind him and knew without looking that it was Rey. She had been taking to Chancellor Chaurasia when he had wandered back over to the memorial, but he knew she had seen him leave. The earlier ceremony had included speeches from them both. Larma D’Acy had also spoken. Chewbacca was also a guest of honor, but he had refused to speak, knowing he would be unable to control his emotions. Poe understood; he had barely been able to keep from crying while he spoke, and listening to Rey, who had followed him, had made him cry.

“Are you ready to go?” Rey’s asked softly from behind him.

He nodded and turned to her. “Yes, please.” He was so done with this. While he appreciated the honor the Republic was showing his late mentor, he understood the politics behind this act as well, and he wanted to get away before certain senators and senator-wannabes tried to corner them, schmoozing and begging for their support. While Poe had long ago hung up his Generalship, he and his Jedi wife were still heroes in the eyes of the Republic’s elite.

Taking Rey’s hand, they began walking toward the speeder that would take them back to their hotel. They would stay the night and head back to Yavin in the morning. Back home.

“What were you talking to Chaurasia about?” he asked.

“I was getting her approval for some additions to this memorial,” she said with a smile. “I want to bring two Uneti saplings here as soon as they are old enough. We can plant them on either side of the tower.”

Poe felt joy sweep up through him. “That is a wonderful idea!” Rey and Poe’s father Kes had been carefully cultivating saplings from the Dameron Uneti tree in hopes of planting them at various locations throughout the galaxy. Mirrin Prime would be a perfect place.

“I thought you’d like that,” Rey grinned at him. Then she became serious. “It does mean we’ll have to come back, though.” She knew he had no interest in becoming involved with the current government, preferring to stay on the outside, keeping watch to ensure nothing like the First Order ever rose again.

Poe glanced back at the memorial. “Of course, we’ll come back. Leia deserves our remembrance.”

December 10 - Celebration

Mature Content NC-17

It was only their third Life Day as a couple and they almost didn’t get to spend it together.

Rey had been offworld on a peacekeeping mission for over three weeks. It was supposed to be an easy assignment. New Republic advisors had already laid ground for the peace talks between the Statches and the Aeoliahs, but once Rey arrived both sides had suddenly demanded more from the settlement. Rey learned later that both species had esteemed the Jedi and were trying to prove to her that they were better than the other. In the end, Rey had finally helped them reach a prudent arrangement that would hopefully maintain peace between the two for a long time to come.

She arrived back on Yavin IV in the afternoon, just in time to join in on the annual celebration. Not only was the whole colony gathered to eat and drink and be merry, but several of Rey and Poe’s friends from the Resistance were there to take part in the festivities. Friendships created during war tended to last a lifetime.

Rey landed her little cruiser on the Dameron family landing pad, then rushed to the empty house to shower and change. Wearing a lovely little green dress that she had picked up while on her trip, she jumped in the speeder and headed into the village.

Wetyin’s Colony was lit up already with bright lights that Rey knew would look amazing after the sun set. Decorations representing the local traditions of several species bedecked every corner, as well as most trees and bushes. An open-sided tent had been set up with tables in case it started to rain, and food was being prepared almost non-stop, but those who weren’t currently eating were out and about in the village square, drinking and laughing and singing. There was a live band in front of the local grocery, and several people were dancing.

Rey found her friends easily, as Chewie’s tall form stood out among the crowd. He was the first to see her and immediately wrapped her up in a hug, lifting her feet off the ground. Beau, Kay, Jess, and Karè also swooped in for hugs; she hadn’t seen any of them in almost a year! Finn and Rose followed them. Rey saw them frequently, as they had both finally settled right here in Wetyin’s Colony. After spending almost two years with Lando and Janna helping former stormtroopers find their homes and families, they had finally married and planned to start a family here on Yavin IV.

Rey and Poe had already beaten them in that department; Rey was currently three months pregnant. Nobody but Finn, Rose, and Kes knew and since Rey wasn’t showing, yet, she was content to keep that secret for the time being.

As she was laughing at something Jess was saying, strong arms wrapped around her from behind. Rey tilted her head to the side, welcoming her husband’s wet kiss on her neck.

“Sorry I’m late,” she told him, lacing her fingers with his as they lay over her still flat belly.

“You made it,” he said softly in her ear. “That’s all that matters.”

The party continued on as the afternoon waned and the sun set. The bright orb of Yavin still lit up the sky, preventing complete darkness, but no one complained. Rey and Poe ate, danced, spent time with old friends and new, and ate some more. Never once did they leave each other’s side, and they never stopped touching. By mid-evening, Rey was exhausted, but still wired. Her trip had been long, and while she loved spending time here with her extended family celebrating Life Day, she ached to spend some time alone with her husband even more. As they danced together one more time, she gave him a meaningful look.

No words were needed; Poe understood.

Without any hesitation, they both left the dance area and headed for the edge of the village where Rey had parked their speeder. Rey drove, as Poe had had more than a little alcohol this evening, and within twenty minutes they were home.

“BB8’s gonna be mad we left him and DO behind,” Poe said as he pulled Rey through the front door, nuzzling her neck.

“He probably won’t even notice for hours,” Rey answered, rubbing herself against Poe’s front. He groaned in response.

“That’s a beautiful dress, by the way,” he said just before he began to suck on that spot just below her ear. She shivered in response, her body already prepped and ready thanks to their constant touching all evening. “I can’t wait to take it off.”

“You don’t have to take if off right away,” she answered. Grasping his elbows, she backed up until her butt hit the edge of his desk. She shimmied up onto it, spreading her legs.

His eyebrows shot up as he slid up against her. “A little desperate tonight, aren’t you?”

“Pregnancy hormones,” she responded. “And more than three weeks away from you.”

“Kriff!” he breathed harshly. “I missed you!” He began kissing her, opened mouthed and wet, rocking his pelvis against her core.

Rey pulled her skirt up and out of the way, then began working at his belt and fly, grateful the war was over and he no longer wore a blaster on a regular basis; quickies like this had been almost impossible back in the day when they were both heavily armed. She still carried her lightsaber almost all the time, but it was clipped to her belt and easy to remove when needed.

And it wasn’t in the way tonight.

As Rey gently pulled Poe’s mostly erect cock out of his pants, he took a quick step backwards, taking her panties with him. She hadn’t even felt his hands move that low; she had been so focused on her own task.

“Smooth, Dameron,” she smiled as he quickly moved back between her legs, pushing her skirt back up as it had fallen when he stepped back.

One of his hands fondled her pussy, and he closed his eyes and moaned. “So kriffin’ ready for me,” he whispered.

Rey threw her head back in response to his intimate touch. “Yes!” she hissed. “Poe, please! Now!”

“Yes, Ma’am,” he said with a grin. Taking his cock in hand, he lined himself up and slid home.

“Awwww, yeah!” Rey gasped, bringing her knees up and leaning back slightly, trusting that his arm around her back would keep her from falling all the way.

Poe stopped when he was all the way in, his eyes watching her intently.

Breathing harshly, Rey looked back at him, her skin tingling, her core throbbing. He filled her so absolutely full. “Poe?” she asked, wondering why he was so still.

“My Jedi,” he whispered. His eyes drifted down to where they were joined, then he focused on the lightsaber on her belt with a smirk. “My Jedi.”

Rey knew how turned on he got when he was able to fuck her while she still wore her lightsaber; it didn’t happen very often. “Your Jedi,” she confirmed. “Forever.”

His eyes met hers again. “Forever.” Then he began thrusting, his hips snapping into her over and over again.

The euphoria built once more, and Rey closed her eyes, letting herself go, not fighting the feelings, both physical and emotional, that this man created in her. After weeks of controlling her temper and remaining distant and formal, it was a relief to let herself go. Poe was the only person she opened herself up to completely, the only one she trusted enough to keep her emotions safe. She may be the guardian of the Jedi, but he was the champion of her heart.

Her release came seconds before his. She cried out, letting herself fall forward against him, feeling his arms wrap around her tight as his hips jerked erratically and he spilled himself inside her. For a long moment they simple held each other, panting, Rey’s legs wrapped tight around Poe’s waist, his cock still buried deep inside her.

Finally, Rey lifted her head to look at her husband. “Happy Life Day,” she said with a smile.

Laughing, Poe hugged her once more. “Happy Life Day, Sunshine.”

December 11 - Light(s)

Poe Dameron had never really though much of Christmas.

His mother had been raised Jewish and he father Catholic, but neither practiced their faith much by the time he was born. While he did remember having a decorated tree with presents from Santa under it, that tradition ended after his mother died. As an adult, Christmas was to him just a secular annoyance buoyed by commercialization, the epitome of capitalism. Other than going to his father’s house for dinner on Christmas Eve, the holiday was just another day in his world.

But that was before he met Rey Smith.

Though not one of those ‘bible thumping’ Christians, Rey wasn’t afraid to comment on her belief in Jesus. Her parents had instilled in her a strong faith that continued on even after their deaths in a car accident when she was ten. Growing up in various foster homes, she looked forward to Christmas every year, mostly because no matter where she was, it brought back good memories of her real family and gave her hope for a bright future. While she didn’t attend church regularly, she always made it to Christmas Eve mass every year.

They had begun dating over the summer, after being introduced by Rey’s friend (and foster brother) Finn, who just happened to be dating Poe’s childhood friend Rose. Everything about Rey made Poe happy, even her love of Christmas, though he still couldn’t understand it. She had invited him to go to mass with her, but she had told him that she wouldn’t think less of him if he refused. He told her he’d think about it.

One thing she would not let him get out of, however, was going to Storybook Island to see the lights. Every weekend between Thanksgiving and New Years, the children’s theme park, which closed for the winter, dressed itself up in thousands of Christmas lights. Having grown up in Rapid, Poe had vague memories of going to the park as a child, but had not been near it as an adult, and had never seen the lights. Rey was going to make sure he saw them this year.

They went the weekend before Christmas. They had had snow earlier in the week, but the night itself was mild by South Dakota standards, with temps around 20 and no wind. Poe was already enthralled by the colorful display even before they entered the gate to the park, and as he and Rey wandered along the paths, not only was he awed by the lights, but memories of walking these same paths with his mother as a child found their way to the surface of his mind. Cinderella’s pumpkin coach, the whale that ate Pinocchio, the Wizard of Oz, the old lady in the shoe… he remembered it all, but almost as if it was all from a dream.

He watched as Rey laughed and grinned and pulled him along to something she was excited to see, never letting go of his hand. He had never seen her so giddy! About half way through the park, it started snowing, which only increased Rey’s delight. He stopped her at one point, unable to keep himself from kissing her. She laughingly pushed him away. “Poe, there are kids around!”

“Well, it’s not like I’m gonna bend you over and rail you,” he joked. “Not here, anyway.”

She swatted him playfully, but the glint in her eye told him she was going to remind him he said that later. They eventually made it to the exit, where hot chocolate was being served, and they stood together watching as families with children stopped to see Santa. They also saw more than a few couples like themselves walking hand in hand.

Feeling happier than he had been in a long time, Poe looked at the woman he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. “I wanna make a deal with you,” he told her.

She looked at him, her eyebrows raised. “What kind of deal?”

“I’ll go with you to this Christmas Eve mass… it’s at ten, right?... if you agree to come to my father’s for dinner earlier that evening.”

Rey’s eyes lit up and her beautiful smile grew. “Yeah,” she said. “I like that plan.”

“That doesn’t mean I’m going to go to church with you all the time, though,” he added.

She shook her head. “I don’t expect you to,” she said. “You can’t force faith,” she told him. “Just like you can’t force love. It just happens.”

He gave her a steady look. “Yeah, it just happens.”

“Merry Christmas, Poe.”

“Merry Christmas, Rey.”

December 12 - Warm

Rey trudged through the mud, head down so the hood of her parka kept the rain out of her face, gratefully heading for home.

The majority of the year the weather on Yavin IV was hot and humid, with the occasional storm that dumped warm rain for several minutes before allowing the sun to come back out. However, for about three months of the year, what the Yavinese called ‘winter’ occurred. The true rainy season, where the sun was a rare visitor and the temperatures, though never dipping below the freezing point, were far from hot.

As much as Rey appreciated the lush, green jungles of Yavin’s largest moon, the winter season reminded her too much of Ach-To and the constant cold she had to deal with during her short stay there years ago. Despite her distaste for the winter season’s cold, she had learned to take advantage of it and use it to help train her students. Every year for the last three years (since she had started her training school) she took her first-year students on a three-day excursion through the jungle. She taught them how to live off the land, how to find their way without the sun or the stars to guide them, and how to navigate the terrain that was much more challenging than normal due to the constant rain and mud. They learned how to build shelters and keep a fire going despite the wet. And they learned how to meditate among the discomfort and distractions.

This year she had three students between the ages of six and ten with her, and they had done well, especially considering two were thin-skinned humans like herself, and the other was a Mirialan, a species that was used to a very dry atmosphere. At the end of the third day, Rey led her charges back to the compound not far from the Grand Temple where she had set up her training center. One by one, she dropped the children off at their homes, making sure their parent or guardian was aware of how well they had done and that they had the next couple of days off from training to rest and recuperate. Finally, all three children were home safe, and Rey was able to go home herself.

She was exhausted, but she had worked hard to make sure her students didn’t know. While they had slept restlessly during the past two nights, Rey had not slept at all, and she was feeling that lack of sleep now. She was physically drained, and she was freezing. She wondered if she would ever truly adjust to weather that was anything but hot. She finally reached the little cabin she called home, punching in the code and slipping inside as the door slid open.

She immediately toed off her muddy boots, then pulled off the slicker, hanging it on a hook by the door. Though she knew the house was warm, she still felt chilled, and she moved quickly through the kitchen and down the hall to her bedroom. She saw BB8’s photoreceptor light up as he sensed movement from where he was charging next to DO. She gave him a brief wave and smile, letting him know she was home and okay. He beeped a happy little welcome, then powered down again.

Rey quickly began to undress. Though her poncho had been waterproof, her clothing still felt damp and clammy. There was no way to stay completely dry when out in this weather all the time. As she pulled off her leggings, her teeth began to chatter. She removed her tunic and underthings, then pulled her hair out of its ties, shaking her head and running her fingers through the strands, giving her scalp a quick rub. She ached to jump in the shower and stand under the hot water for a long time, but she was so tired. Sleep called to her more, but she knew she wouldn’t sleep unless she warmed up.

And she knew what would do that just as well as a hot shower.

With a soft sigh, she skipped over to the bed, pulled the blankets up, and slipped under them, tucking herself up against the human furnace already laying there.

“Kriffing hell, Rey!” Poe Dameron shouted as Rey’s cold skin woke him up. “What are you doing?!”

“I’m cold!” she said with a bit of a whine in her voice.

“Yeah, you are!” he agreed. “You’re a farking ice cube!”

“You’re warm!” she continued, still huddling against him despite his stiff position. Her body shivered violently and her teeth chattered.

“Crik,” Poe whispered, then he relaxed, arranged the blankets so they were both fully covered, and wrapped both his arms and legs around her.

Rey immediately felt warmer, and soon her shivering stopped. It wasn’t long before she began to drift off to sleep, lulled by the rhythmic heartbeat of her husband, best friend…

And personal heater.

December 13 - Stars

A little sequel to 'Future'

“See that one, right there?” Poe asked as he pointed upward. “About three degrees from Astrides?”

He and Rey were lying on their backs looking up at the night sky. It was Tinieblas, what locals called the few nights every month when complete darkness settled over this particular area of Yavin IV. It was the best time to view the stars, most of which weren’t visible the rest of the month thanks to the gas giant Yavin lighting up the night sky.

“Yeah,” Rey whispered, responding to his question.

“That’s Mandalore.”

“Is there anything there anymore?” Rey asked, a bit breathless. She had heard many legends regarding Mandalorians.

“Not much, from what I understand,” Poe answered. “But I think there are some Mandos out there that want to bring it back.”

He pointed again. “Now look just to the left of Mandalore’s star. The larger of the three there. That’s Kashyyyk.”

“Really?” Rey smiled. Chewie was there right now, going to take some time with his family after dropping both Poe and Rey off at Poe’s father’s farm. They had been spending the last six months looking for old Jedi temples. Or the remains of, in most cases. The Emperor had scoured the galaxy and destroyed as many as he could access years ago.

“Oh!” Poe said suddenly, looking at the star chart on his datapad. “I had to look this one up, and you can barely see it, but…” He held up the chart for Rey to see, and together they used it to find a faint star off to the right, just above the treeline. “You see it?”

“Yeah,” Rey answered. “What is it?”

“Jakku.”

Rey looked at Poe, her eyes wide.

Poe shrugged. “I know neither of us have fond memories of the place, but it is where you found BB8 and Finn.” He gave her a long look. “And they brought you to me.”

Rey gave him a soft smile, then looked back toward the star in question. “I used to stare up at the stars often at night back on Jakku. The moons are both small and there were many nights the sky was so full of stars you could never look at the exact same cluster from night to night.” She paused. “I wonder if I ever looked at Yavin without knowing it?”

“Maybe,” Poe answered quietly.

“Maybe the Force pointed it out to me unconsciously,” Rey said. “I often wonder what the Force was responsible for during my life on Jakku,” she continued. “Or was it dormant until I left?”

“Did you ever have any strange dreams or premonitions growing up?” Poe asked.

“Nothing like I have now when I meditate,” Rey told him. “Dreams are dreams. How do you know if they mean anything or not?”

“True,” Poe conceded. “I’ve had some really weird dreams before. And some pretty scary ones, too.”

Rey turned to lay on her side facing him, resting her elbow on the ground and holding her head in her hand. “Did you ever dream of me?” she asked with a playful smile. “I mean, before we…” She gave him a little half-shrug.

Poe laughed. “You mean did I ever fantasize about making love to the cute Jedi Leia was training? I would never!”

Rey snorted. “I had a vision about making love to you, once.”

Poe’s eyes widened. “Really?”

She nodded. “I didn’t have any idea if it would come true or not,” she continued. “But I wanted it to,” she added softly.

“I’m so glad it did,” Poe told her, patting his chest in invitation.

Rey accepted, laying down next to him with her head on his shoulder. “Me, too.”

December 14 - Parents

It had been a long day, but as Rey settled into her bed next to Poe, she knew it wasn’t over, yet.

She had been thinking a lot of deep thoughts that day. One of her students, a young human boy named Relgan, had hurt himself while out hiking through the jungle around mid-morning. Instead of crying due to the pain or being scared of how badly he was hurt, Relgan had kept apologizing. Over and over again. Rey knew the young boy had been orphaned as a baby and had been raised by the owner of a maintenance shop on Anael. He had not been treated well by the man, and Rey had literally had to buy the child from the man in order to get him away from the slavery he’d known his whole life. Now he was in training to be a Jedi, and was doing well mentally, but he still did and said things that reminded Rey that he was not completely healed from a lifetime of trauma.

“Poe?” she said softly, hoping he wasn’t asleep already.

“Yeah?” He sounded alert.

“I was thinking… I’d like to adopt Relgan.”

Poe turned his head to look at her, his eyebrows high. “Adopt? You’re already his official guardian.”

“I know,” Rey said. “But I feel like if we adopt him, together, that will give him the sense of family that will help him heal even more. Sometimes I think he still sees himself as a slave, even if his current master, me, is good to him.”

“So, you want him to take the Dameron name?” he asked softly.

“If… if you don’t want that-“

“No!” Poe interrupted her. “I don’t mind at all. It would be an honor to call him our son.” He shrugged, giving her a grin. “I always figured we’d become parents someday.”

Rey bit her lip and frowned. Poe noticed. “What’s wrong?”

“About the parent thing,” she said. “Do you want children? Naturally?”

Poe looked at her for a long time, his expression serious. “I guess,” he started. “I never really thought about it. I mean, I guess I thought that, should I ever fall in love with a woman, I wouldn’t be opposed to us having babies together. But as my taste in partners back then was, shall we say ‘lacking uniformity,’ having babies naturally wasn’t always an option.” He paused. “Do you not want to have babies?”

Rey kept her eyes down, and she began picking nervously at a loose thread on the blanket covering them. “I did before,” she finally told him. She looked up, meeting his eyes. “Before I found out who I was.”

Poe shook his head. “Rey, you have nothing to worry about when it comes to your bloodline. You have far too much light in you to worry about your children.”

“Leia was all light, too,” she argued. “And look what happened to Ben!”

Poe reached over and gently stroked her cheek. “Those were extenuating circumstances, but I get it. I understand why you would be afraid.”

“So, you don’t mind that I don’t want children of my own?”

“Of course not,” he confirmed. “We can still be parents for Relgan, and however many other children you feel need a real family.”

She smiled at him, but she still felt sorrow deep inside. Poe seemed to sense it; for a man who could not use the Force, it sure seemed to use him sometimes.

“You can always change your mind, Rey,” he told her. “Just let me know.”

She nodded. “Thank you.” She scooched forward and snuggled up against him. “You are going to be an amazing dad.”

“I think we’re going to be amazing parents,” Poe added. “After we mess up a few hundred times, anyway.”

Rey giggled. “How do you know we’ll mess up?’

“Because good parents always mess up,” Poe told her. “But they learn. And they get better. And they never stop loving their kids or each other.”

“Sounds perfect,” Rey said, her eyes closed, a dreamy smile on her face as she drifted off to sleep.

December 15 - Children

Poe rubbed his eyes and sighed heavily. He was so tired. It had been a super busy week at work and he had been looking forward to the weekend, but here it was eight o’clock on Friday and he was sitting in the waiting room of the only Urgent Care clinic in Jakku, trying his best to keep his three-year-old son Seth occupied while they waited for his seven-year-old daughter Leia to be seen.

Rey was sitting next to him with Leia curled up on her lap. The little girl had cut herself severely on an old saw that had been in the shed. Her arm was wrapped up tightly in a makeshift bandage and her tears were mostly dry, but she still sniffled from time to time. She had taken it upon herself to ‘borrow’ the saw and cut down a tiny little pine down by the lake shore, so she could have her own little Christmas tree in her treehouse. She knew she had been naughty, and that on top of the injury was what had made her cry. At the moment, Poe and Rey were not mad, just scared. Her discipline, Poe thought, would be getting stitches.

The facility was busy on this cold December night, and while Leia was content to sit on her mom’s lap, Seth was getting tired and bored. Poe had read to him, tried to get him to watch the TV (it was the Weather Channel; not the most exciting of viewing choices), and had taken him outside more than once to walk around until they got too cold. The desk nurse had just informed them that a doctor would be available soon.

Poe leaned over to Rey. “I’m gonna pee quick,” he whispered.

Rey nodded, but otherwise barely acknowledged him. She looked as tired as he felt.

“Come on, bud,” he told Seth. As wired as the child was, he didn’t want to leave him with Rey and his sister; Rey’s focus needed to stay on Leia at the moment. He picked his son up and headed for the door of the tiny bathroom that sat just before the hall to the exam rooms. Small towns, small waiting rooms, small medical facilities.

He put Seth down and carefully locked the door behind them; he wasn’t about to have Seth open the door while his pants were open. “Do you need to pee?” he asked his son softly, knowing there were people close on the other side of the door. Might as well kill two birds with one stone.

Seth shook his head, then proceeded to spin around in a circle. Suddenly, while Poe was about mid-stream, he stopped and stared at Poe’s cock. “Daddy, your willy is huge!” he practically shouted.

Poe grimaced and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling his face heat. There was no way that hadn’t been heard in the waiting room. He finished, zipped himself up and moved to wash his hands. Seth, of course, wanted to wash his hands, too. Finally, he took a deep breath, took his son’s hand, and exited the bathroom.

Poe kept his eyes forward, intentionally not looking at anyone, but he was pretty positive a few eyes were on him. He walked over to Rey, who still sat with Leia on her lap, looking no different than when he left. Except for the tiny smile on her lips.

He sat and pulled Seth onto his lap. His son finally seemed to be getting sleepy enough to settle, and Poe happily let the boy lay against his chest. They sat silently for a while until a nurse came down from the exam rooms. “Dameron?” she asked.

Rey and Poe both stood, Rey setting Leia back on her feet, and they headed for the nurse.

But as they did so, Rey nudged Poe and said with a smile, “He’s not wrong.”

Poe’s face heated once again as more than one person laughed.

December 16 - Siblings

“What is going on here?” Rey demanded as she entered the room. After a busy morning, she had finally been able to sit down and work on the scheduling for the coming week. She hadn’t gotten very far before the sound of her two youngest boys fighting in the next room had distracted her.

Skyler and Samuel were pummeling each other rather comedically, but stopped and looked up at her when she spoke, both looking rather guilty.

“Who started this?” Rey asked her two boys, looking around for their older sister, who was supposed to be with them.

“He hit back first!” Sam said, his little arms folded in front of him.

Somehow, Rey managed not to laugh. Three-year-old Samuel was as naughty as he was cute. He was too much like his father. She looked at six-year-old. “Skyler?” she said, eyebrows raised in expectation.

“I didn’t mean to hit him!” Sky defended. “He was reaching for a brick just as I grabbed for another one. My hand hit his arm.”

“Well, it doesn’t matter how it started,” Rey told them. “Neither of you should have hit back.” She looked around again. “Where’s your sister?”

The two boys shrugged, immediately going back to playing with the toy bricks on the floor in front of them. Typical, she thought. Overly dramatic one moment, then suddenly focused on something different the next.

Just like their father.

Shaking her head, she left the room and moved to the front door. She opened it, feeling the desert heat of Tatooine flow inside. For her, it wasn’t a bad feeling. Despite griping about once again living on a hot, dry planet, Rey preferred it to cold winters on Kolbe, their previous home. She saw movement off to the right, by Finn’s house, and lifted her hand to shield her eyes from the sun. She could see the familiar form of her husband walking across the sands, heading for the workshop. He was being trailed by two smaller forms, his daughter and his droid.

She slipped back inside the house, content knowing Shaina was with her father. Rey hadn’t seen the eight-year-old girl leave, but she had been distracted. She would talk with her daughter about not leaving without letting Rey know later. This desert was easy to get lost in, and while Shaina was already becoming comfortable with using the Force that came so easily to her, she was still a child.

Rey was about to sit down again when a soft whine came from the bedroom. Giving a soft sigh of her own, she stood and headed toward the cry. Baby Shiloh, not quite ten months old, was sitting up in her crib, looking flushed and confused. Rey knew the feeling; she felt that way after naps, too. As Shi raised her arms, asking to be picked up, the two boys ran into the room. They were fascinated with their little sister and were always asking to hold and play with her.

“Can Shiloh play with us, Mama?”

“She always tries to eat the bricks but we stop her.”

Rey smiled at them as she picked the baby up. “Shiloh needs her diaper changed and then she needs to eat, then we’ll see if she wants to play. Okay?”

“Okay,” the boys said in tandem, then they turned back to the sitting room to continue with their play.

Once the baby was changed, Rey moved back to the kitchen to continue working while she nursed. Because she was so busy teaching, Rey weaned her babies off the breast when they were about three months old. They usually took to the bottle easily, as their father usually started feeding them that way when they were only a couple of weeks old, but Shiloh had been a little tougher to transition, and even now she made attempts to open Rey’s shirt. Poe teased her about it, telling her that he, too, thought Rey’s tits were irresistible.

As if her thought conjured him, Poe entered the front door, Shaina, BB8, and a wave of heat following him.

“Your daughter thinks I should rearrange the workshop,” he said as he closed the door behind his entourage. “She thinks I did it wrong.”

Rey smirked. “Your daughter left the house without telling me,” Rey countered. “Her brothers started fighting because she wasn’t there to keep the peace.”

“Keeping the peace is boring!” Shaina griped as she sat next to her mother at the table. “And so are my brothers.”

Rey snorted a laugh as Poe moved to the cooling chamber and pulled out some juice. He looked back at Rey, eyebrows raised in question, and Rey nodded. Poe proceeded to pour five glasses.

“Boys,” Rey called out. “Come have some juice.”

Sky and Sam came skipping in, sitting around the table as Poe distributed the drinks, then he sat down himself. For the short time it took them to drink it was mostly quiet, but all too soon the children started picking at each other again.

Rey looked at Poe, who was watching her. “Did you get the schedule done?” he asked.

Rey glanced at the kids, then back at him. “What do you think?”

“I think it’s time for everyone to come out to the shop and help Shaina and I rearranged it,” he said with a grin. He stood and reached for Shiloh, who had stopped nursing long ago and was watching her siblings curiously. The baby reached back for him with a smile. “Come on, guys! You, too, BB8!”

With a wink, Poe headed back out into the Tatooine heat with all four of their children.

The silence was deafening.

Smiling, Rey got to work on the schedule.

December 17 - Friends

Mature Content

“Poe!” Rey hissed softly as the pilot grabbed her arm and pulled her behind the shelf holding engine parts. “What are you doing?”

He directed her into the corner, stepping into her until her back hit the wall. He looked deeply into her eyes, and when she didn’t protest anymore, he moved in to kiss her.

Rey had come to the hanger to drop off some reports for the Commander from Leia. She had not expected to get accosted by the pilot. She wouldn’t have minded, but they were in a public place, and they were supposedly keeping their relationship a secret.

Poe’s kisses shut off any protests she may have had. Force, she loved his kisses. They couldn’t even really be called ‘kisses,’ she thought. He made love to her mouth, using lips and tongue and even teeth on occasion. It was carnal, it was sensual, it was lascivious. It caused her arousal to go from zero to one hundred in seconds.

She dropped the data pad she had been holding onto the floor and wrapped her arms around his neck, fisting his hair in one hand. He groaned into her mouth; he loved it when she pulled on his hair. He eased back, coming up for air, and they both gasped for a moment.

“What’s this about?” Rey whispered, panting.

He shook his head. “I was letting my imagination get carried away while I was working, and then you walk in, and I just needed to continue with my fantasy.” He grinned. “It’s so much better in real life.”

Rey glanced over his shoulder. “There are too many people here,” she argued.

Poe moved his hips forward, and Rey caught her breath as she felt his arousal press into her. “Kriff, Poe!” He was not making this easy.

“Tell me you’re not wet,” Poe mumbled against her cheek. He brought his tongue out and licked the corner of her mouth.

Rey moaned and bit her bottom lip, trying to keep silent. She couldn’t deny it.

His lips traveled down her cheek to her jaw, then down to her neck. Rey threw her head back, feeling it tap against the wall behind her, then she lifted her right leg, bringing it up around his hip, opening herself to him.

He moved his hips in immediately and began rutting against her core. “Kriff, Rey. I can feel how hot you are even through our clothes,” he said against her neck. His hands had dropped down to cup her ass, pulling her lower body into him, meeting his thrusts. With his flight suit, utility belt and blaster on, and she with her leggings, blaster, and belt with Luke’s lightsaber at her waist, this was all they could do.

Until tonight. When they could meet secretly out in their special place in the forest. Rey’s body shuddered as she thought about what he would do to her there.

“Hey, Poe?”

Finn’s inquiry was all the warning they had, and it was far too late, as their friend came around the corner immediately after he called out.

Poe pulled back as Rey dropped her leg. He spun around to face Finn. They were both gasping for air, faces flushed.

Finn stared at them wide-eyed, looking back and forth between them, his shock evident. Then he seemed to collect himself, and the shock changed to anger and hurt. “How long?” he whispered.

Rey licked her lips. They had talked about telling Finn. He was their best friend, after all. But it had been exciting and heady sneaking around, keeping this secret from everyone but BB8 (who they had made promise to not tell anyone).

Poe cleared his throat and glanced back at Rey. “Uhm, about three weeks now,” he answered.

“Three… three weeks?” Finn muttered. “How..?” he started, glancing back around the corner he had come around, making sure no one was close. “Does anyone else know?”

Rey shook her head. “Just BB8,” she said softly. “Finn, we wanted to tell you…”

“But it was still so new, so special,” Poe continued when Rey paused. “We just wanted to keep it to ourselves for a while. Make sure it was real.” He shook his head a little. “We don’t want Leia or the rest of command to know. Not yet.”

“Why?” Finn asked, his face confused.

Poe looked at Rey, his eyebrows high. He had asked her that more than once in the last three weeks.

Rey sighed. “I’m supposed to be a Jedi, Finn. The Jedi didn’t…” she waved her hand vaguely between herself and Poe. “Do this.”

Finn snorted. “If you really believe that, you’re more naive than I thought.”

“Finn,” Poe started to argue, ready to defend Rey even when he didn’t agree with her.

“What?” Finn countered. “I’m supposed to be happy about this? That my two best friends were keeping something so important from me?”

“I’m sorry, Finn,” Rey told him. “It was my idea to keep it a secret. Please don’t be mad at Poe.”

Finn stood with his arms crossed, his expression stern. “I’m not… mad, really. I just… you guys both mean a lot to me, and I want to be a part of your lives.” He paused. “I know I’ve been with Rose a lot lately, and not spending a lot of time with you… which is probably why you managed to sneak this by me, just so you know!”

Rey and Poe smiled.

“And we are both very happy for you and Rose,” Poe said.

Finn took a deep breath. “Is it serious?” he suddenly asked. “I mean, is it more than just a fling?” He was looking at Poe as he said this. He knew the pilot was much more experienced than Rey in the relationship department.

Poe once more looked at Rey, a question in his eyes as he said firmly, “I know it’s real.” He cocked his head. “I’m in this for the long haul.” He paused, and Rey felt his gaze upon her as if it was a physical thing. “I’m here as long as she wants me.”

Rey felt her heart race. They had never talked about the future. Not really. This relationship had started unexpectedly, when an argument had become heated and they had ended up making out under the Falcon. They had pulled apart, shocked and aroused, then Rey had told him breathlessly to meet her after the evening meal in the meadow south of the base. She had been so afraid he wouldn’t come, and a part of her had hoped he wouldn’t, but he had. And her life had never been the same since.

She gave Poe a soft smile. “That’s going to be for a very, very long time, Commander.”

Finn gave a sigh of relief. Once more he looked back around the corner. “Well, if you want to keep this a secret, you’re damn lucky I was the one who found you and not Suralinda.”

Rey and Poe laughed.

“So, you’ll keep quiet?” Rey asked Finn. “For now?”

“Of course,” Finn nodded. “No more secrets, okay?”

“Okay,” Poe agreed. He looked back at Rey. “I better get back to work.”

“Oh!” Rey gasped. She picked up the dropped data pad. “I was supposed to give you this.” She handed it to Poe.

Finn started laughing. “I’m thinking that if you want to keep this a secret, you two need to control yourselves a whole lot better!”

Rey blushed as Poe ran his hand over his face. “Yeah, yeah,” he grumbled good naturedly. “Let’s get back to work.”

December 18 - Food

It was no secret Rey loved loloberries.

She had never had them before joining the Resistance, and though that could be said for a lot of food, loloberries became her favorite quickly. Poe had recognized this fact early on, and had tried to save some for her whenever they were offered during a meal. At first, he had made BB8 sneak them into her quarters, but she found out who was doing the sneaking pretty quick. After that, Poe would bring them directly to her at the end of the day and they would share, though Poe made sure she got the majority of what he brought. He liked them, too, but not as much as she did. Plus, he took a great deal of pleasure seeing her so happy.

Unfortunately, with the war dragging on, it was getting harder and harder to find fresh rations for everyone at the base. Loloberries were at the bottom of the list of necessities. Rey, of course, understood this, and was okay with it, but Poe knew she missed the sweet treat she had become so fond of.

Life Day was approaching, and it would be Rey’s first real Life Day. While certain individuals on Jakku celebrated it, it wasn’t a community wide event, so Rey rarely ever knew it was even happening. Despite the tight rations, Leia had approved an evening for everyone to celebrate this year, and Poe was determined to get Rey a present he knew she would appreciate.

Whenever he knew someone was going off base, he asked them to keep their eyes open for any fresh loloberries they might be able to purchase, or at least to let Poe know where some might be. Because he was one of the First Order’s ‘Most Wanted’ right now, he knew that he couldn’t really go anyplace too populated for fear of being recognized, but he was ready to bargain with anyone who could get him those loloberries before Life Day.

Snap and Jess teased him mercilessly for his devotion to finding Rey some loloberries, but Suralinda and Karè both supported the idea wholeheartedly. It was Jess and Suralinda that finally found them. A farmer on Kenoshii that was selling several processed Tip-Yips also grew loloberries and had several ripe ones ready to go. While Jess and Suralinda had only been sent for the Tip-Yip, they made sure a nice sized load of loloberries were included. On the way back to the base, they agreed that Poe should spend the next month doing their laundry in return for their purchase of the berries.

Poe was ecstatic and though he rolled his eyes at the ‘payment,’ he didn’t argue. He noticed the look the women gave each other at his acquiesce, but he didn’t try to defend himself. At this point, he didn’t care if the First Order knew he was smitten with Rey.

Life Day came. While a skeleton crew kept an eye on their defenses, the rest of the base took the evening off to enjoy the Tip-yip, mashed topatos, spiced bogwing, and Rorkid bread. The evening was half over when Poe brought out the big bowl of loloberries and placed in on the table in front of Rey.

“Share them, or keep them all to yourself,” he told her as she looked at the bowl with wide eyes. “They’re all yours.”

Rey blinked rapidly as everyone around her cheered. “Happy Life Day!”

“Of course, I’m sharing!” Rey finally said, laughing. “But I’m also keeping some for later!”

It was as the party wound down that Poe found out what Rey’s ‘later’ meant.

She grabbed his arm, towing him out of the mess. “I need to talk to you in private.” She led him to her quarters. Once there, she deposited her small stash of berries, which she had wrapped in a handkerchief, in the middle of her bed. Right where Poe used to have BB8 leave his berries back when he had been sneaking them into Rey’s room for Poe.

“Share them with me?” Rey asked softly.

“You know very well I’m not as addicted as you are to them,” Poe said wryly.

“Then sit and talk with me while I enjoy them,” she said with a smile.

Poe nodded. “I can do that.”

They talked until the loloberries were gone, and then even beyond that. When Poe finally left a half-asleep Rey shortly before 0100, he knew there would be rumors around base. And he didn’t care. He had just had one of the best Life Days ever with the most amazing woman he had ever known.

And maybe someday, when Rey was ready, those rumors would become true.

December 19 - Fire

“This was the stupidest idea you’ve ever had in a long list of stupid ideas.”

Poe turned and glared at the woman behind him, but it wasn’t like he could really see her face, and she most likely couldn’t see his glare. They were both swaddled up from head to toe to protect themselves from the wicked 80 KPH wind that was swirling around them. As if the wind wasn’t bad enough, it was also snowing, so visibility was nil. Luckily, Rey was staying close to him; it wouldn’t do to lose each other in this mess.

Poe turned forward again and looked down at the sensor in his hands. They were almost to the outcropping of rocks that had stood mid-way between where they had landed the little cruiser and the settlement they had come to visit. It had been Poe’s idea to land the ship a couple of kilometers away from the settlement so as to not startle the villagers, who were simple, planet-bound people. They knew about space travel, but had no interest in leaving their safe little communities.

Because of this, the First Order had no interest in them, and the Resistance had been using this community to acquire rations for the last few months. Poe had volunteered to go this time, and he had been planning on bringing Finn with him, but Leia had asked Finn to help her with a specific project at the last minute. “Take Rey,” had been her directive.

The weather when they arrived had been fair, sunny and mild, and they had already brought the foodstuffs back to the ship early in the afternoon, borrowing a cart the was pulled by an equine-looking animal with four horns called a Polinn. They returned the cart and animal, said their thank-yous and goodbyes, and headed back to the ship on foot. The wind had become stronger and cold during their journey back to the village, but the snow didn’t start until they had left. They talked briefly about turning back, but Poe decided it wasn’t too far a walk and that they should continue on. He was regretting that decision.

A dark shape appeared in front of Poe and he stopped. Rey crashed softly into his back, indicating that she had been focused on the ground in front of her. “These are the rocks we saw on the way,” he told her, shouting to be heard above the wind. “There was a recess that looked like a cave on the south side.”

He saw Rey nod. Poe turned to the right and followed the base of the rocky outcropping. The wind began to ease as the rocks protected them from it, but the snow still swirled around them madly. Finally, Poe saw the opening he had noted during their previous journeys by the outcropping. He ducked in, pleased to find it was indeed a cave, and a deep one. He pulled out his glowrod and lit it up.

Rey was already removing the scarf from her face and letting the hood of her coat down. The air temperature wasn’t too excessively cold, only a few degrees below freezing, so once out of the wind it wasn’t unpleasant. But it was still going to be too cold to be comfortable if they stayed the night here.

“Look!” Rey said, nodding toward the center of the large cavern. A fire pit lay in the sand, and along the wall not to far from it sat a stack of wood. “Someone’s used this for shelter before.”

“Often, from the looks of it,” Poe agreed. “You want to keep going and try and find the ship or do you want to hunker here until this storm passes?” While he could read the direction they were going on his sensor, they could still miss the ship and walk right on by it in the snow.

“You mean I get a choice?” she asked. She had griped more than once that Poe was being overbearing. Yes, he was in charge during this mission, but did he have to be so bossy?

Poe took a deep breath. “Yes, in this case, you get a choice.”

Rey looked back at the entrance to the cave. They could just barely see the swirling snow trying to get in, and they could still hear the wind howling. “It’ll be dark soon,” she said softly. “This isn’t much different than a sandstorm,” she continued. “You should always find shelter and wait out a sandstorm. As cold as it is, I’d think it’s even more important to do that now.” She looked back at him, her eyes wide. There was no fear in them; Poe didn’t think he’d ever seen Rey afraid. But there was worry.

Poe nodded. “Let’s make a fire, then,” he said. “And get comfortable. Hopefully this thing is done by morning.”

They worked together to gather wood, and Poe used his multitool to light one of the smaller pieces on fire, centering it among the rest of the fuel. Soon, a comfortable fire was crackling away. He pulled the strap of his pack over his shoulder and opened it, finding the ration bars he had stuffed inside before leaving base. He pulled them out.

Rey gave him a surprised look.

“Always be prepared,” Poe grinned. He offered one to Rey.

Smiling slightly, she took it, then pulled out her canteen. She shook it. “Not frozen, yet,” she said, then she sat it down near the fire so it would stay thawed. Poe did the same.

Quietly, they ate, occasionally looking outside. The wind sounded like it was getting even worse, and they could feel the temperature drop as the sun began to set. Eventually, it was dark enough they couldn’t see out the entrance, but they could still hear the wind.

“We should sleep,” Poe said. “We’d stay a lot warmer if we… huddled, together.”

Rey gave him an odd look. Or maybe it was just the way the shadows from the firelight played with her face. “You want us to cuddle?” she asked.

He shrugged. “It’ll be a lot more comfortable.”

“Is that an order, Commander?”

Poe groaned. “No, of course it’s not an order,” he said, frustrated. “Kriff, Rey, if you don’t want to you don’t have to. I just know how cold you get.” He pulled out the emergency blanket out of his pack and moved to lay down. "I don't know why you have to be so contrary all the time. I know you don’t like following orders from me, but Kriff, Rey, what’d I ever do to you to make you so… hateful?”

“I’m not hateful!” Rey argued. “I just…”

“You don’t trust me,” Poe finished for her. He settled in, head on his pack, staring at the fire. It shouldn’t hurt this much, he thought. Not being liked by Rey. While he tended to get along with everybody, he’d had his fair share of people he didn’t get along with. They’d never bothered him like Rey did. Maybe it was because BB8 and Finn and even Leia all loved her and she loved and respected them. He really, really liked Rey… when she wasn’t talking back or arguing with him. He’d wracked his brain trying to understand why she didn’t like him.

“I trust you, Poe,” she said softly. He looked over at her. She was still sitting, her knees up to her chest, her arms wrapped around them. “I just… you make me feel so… I don’t know. Inferior?”

Poe sat up sharply. “What?!”

Rey glanced at him, but looked away quickly. “You’re so perfect,” she continued. “Everyone loves you. BB8 couldn’t stop telling me how amazing you were long before I ever met you. I felt like I knew you, and then when we met…”

“When we met what?” he pushed. He thought their first real meeting had been amazing. He still dreamed of the smile she gave him that day. She hadn’t smiled at him like that since.

She shrugged. “You looked at me as if I was special. And not because of what I had done, not because of what I was.” Her cheeks seemed to be darker, Poe thought. Maybe it was just because of the heat from the fire. “Then when things settled, I realized you looked at everyone that way. And that’s just who you are,” she emphasized, looking at him briefly. “You make everyone around you feel special and capable and important. That’s why you’re such a great leader.”

Poe felt himself becoming embarrassed by her words. “I hear a ‘but’ in there,” he said softly.

"But you started treating me different,” she continued. “Like I was… different.”

“You are different,” Poe agreed. “You’re a Jedi.” He could see her face scrunch up at his words, and he began talking again before she could argue. “You’re also stubborn and headstrong and independent,” he paused as she looked up at him. “And smart and confusing and beautiful and…”

Her mouth was open in shock as she looked at him.

He licked his lips. “The fact is, Rey, I’m not sure how to act around you. Do I treat you with reverence like a Jedi? Do I treat you like a green soldier under my command? Do I treat you like a friend, only to find out you don’t want that kind of intimacy with me?” He took a deep breath. “I like you Rey, and I respect you, and I want to be your friend, but I always feel that I’m so far out of your orbit that you don’t even see me as a colleague much less a confidant. I say things to you to make you mad because sometimes that’s the only emotion you show me.” He ended his statement quietly, looking down at the fire in front of him. Embarrassed for opening himself up so much.

They were silent for a long while, but then Rey spoke up. “You want to know something?” She waited for Poe to look at her. “You make me feel every emotion I’ve ever known. More than any other person I’ve ever known. It scares me.” She looked away, whispering, “That’s why I hide it.”

“It seems we’ve been misreading each other for a while now,” Poe replied, his voice hushed. “Projecting emotions onto each other that aren’t there.”

“How do we fix it?” Rey asked, her eyes huge and soft, glowing gently in the firelight.

“Let’s start over.” Poe held his hand out toward her. “I’m Poe.”

With a smile teasing the corner of her mouth, Rey reached back and took his hand. “Rey.”

“I know,” Poe responded.

Rey smiled. The same beautiful smile she had given him on the Falcon after leaving Crait. Only bigger. Warmer. Happier.

Instead of letting go of her hand, he tugged on it gently. “Now get over here and cuddle with me so we can stay warm while we sleep.” He let go of her hand as she sighed heavily and grabbed up her pack, pulling out the blanket and moving over closer to him.

“You are so bossy,” she grumbled, but there was no anger in her voice.

“See, now that you had right about me,” he told her with a grin.

She shook her head and smiled back, then sat down in front of him. She spread out her blanket and they both lay down, her back to his front, facing the fire. Slowly, Poe brought his arm around her. “Is this okay?” he asked. If she didn’t want him touching her, he wouldn’t.

“It’s fine,” she said softly.

He settled with his arm loosely around her waist. He could feel her relax in front of him, and his own body eased in response. “Goodnight, Rey.”

“Goodnight, Poe.”

December 20 - Snuggles

Rey moved slowly along the path, her mind a jumble, her emotions unstable. She didn’t know what she had done to make Nyra and Kolbert dislike her. She had never been unfriendly toward them, and she didn’t think she had done anything that would make them judge her harshly. She had always been friendly and appreciative of their work. In the past, they had seemed to like her, to want to talk to her. But today they had given her the cold shoulder, barely acknowledging her when she had told them good morning.

Maybe she was being too friendly, Rey thought as she walked along, not really paying attention to where she was going. Maybe she was trying too hard, insinuating herself into a relationship with them that they didn’t want. Being too clingy. Rey had never been good at making friends, and when she found people that thought like her, liked the things she liked, had a similar sense of humor, she found herself drawn to them. So, maybe she had seen a friendship there that was only in her imagination, and they had decided she was getting too close.

She should just stick to droids as friends, she thought. If they hurt her feelings, she knew for a fact that hadn’t meant to.

“Hey!”

The soft exclamation was the only warning she had before she crashed softly into someone. She looked up as Poe grabbed her shoulders, an amused smile on his face.

“Where were you?” he asked. “You looked like you were lightyears away.”

“I…” she started, then shook her head, feeling tears form in her eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Poe said, his smile disappearing as his expression became concerned. “What’s wrong?”

Rey stepped back away from him, embarrassed, wiping the tears quickly away. “Nothing,” she said, but even she could hear the lie. “I’m just… why can’t I make friends?” she asked suddenly. “Why does everyone I like not like me? What do I do that makes everyone leave?”

“Whoa!” Poe gasped. “Where is this coming from?”

Rey shrugged. “It’s been like that ever since I was a child,” she continued. “I’ve always known I was different. Others my age either made fun of me or would be kind to me for a while then turn on me, without warning.” She wiped another tear away. “I grew up thinking that was just the way of things on Jakku, but I stupidly kept believing that once I got to know people, became friends with them, that I wouldn’t be alone anymore. But they always left. Always.”

Poe was silent for a while. “Has Finn left?” he asked softly. “Chewie?” He tilted his head. “Me?”

Rey looked at him for a moment, then looked away. “You would if you weren’t so devoted to the Resistance.”

“You think that little of me?”

“It’s just what happens,” Rey whispered. “It’s nothing to do with you. It’s me. I’m just not… good with people. I never will be.” She couldn’t look at him.

“Rey, you know for a fact that I get along with pretty much everybody, right?”

Rey sniffed and nodded. “Yeah, you do.”

“I happen to think that you are just fine with people,” he continued. “It’s not you. If you are treated badly by someone you thought was a friend or you get ‘left,’ as you call it, it’s on that person or persons and has nothing to do with you.” He reached for her shoulders again. “Look at me,” he demanded softly.

She looked up at him.

“Do you believe that I consider you a friend?”

“I want to,” she answered, her voice cracking. “But the more I care, the more it hurts. And the more I try not to care, the more that hurts.” She took a deep breath. “If this war wasn’t going on, would you really want to be around me?”

Poe laughed suddenly, causing Rey to stare at him with her mouth open in shock.

“Rey, if this war wasn’t going on, I wouldn’t just want to be around you. I’d want to be with you all the time. I’d want…” he paused. “I’d want to be more than a friend.”

Rey felt her heart start to race, understanding his meaning and finding it not only hard to believe, but exciting.

“But there is a war going on,” Poe continued, looking downcast. “And I can’t afford to offer more than friendship right now. But I can guarantee you that my friendship is real, and strong, and true.” He took a deep breath. “Do you believe me now?”

How could Rey not? He was so earnest, so sincere. She nodded.

“Good. Now who was it that made you so unsure of yourself tonight?”

Rey gave a little half-shrug. “Nyra and Kolbert,” she told him.

Poe’s eyes widened. “Really?” He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Well, I think I know exactly why they are treating you differently. And I was right, it has nothing to do with you.”

“What do you mean?”

“They’re jealous.”

“Jealous?”

He nodded. “Jealous because you have only been with us for a couple of months now, and you’ve already established yourself as an elite member of Leia’s team. And it’s not because you’re a Jedi. You’re just that good at strategy and diplomacy.”

He looked over to his left and his eyebrows rose. Rey looked too and saw the subjects of their discussion. Poe suddenly turned to move next to her, throwing his arm over her shoulders and coaxing her to walk with him.

“And not to boast, but they probably don’t like the fact that you’re such good friends with me,” he said.

Rey had never been a touchy-feely kind of person, mostly because she hadn’t had much experience with physical affection, but she really liked being pressed up against Poe’s side, his arm tight around her.

“I thought you couldn’t afford to offer more than friendship right now?” she teased.

“Well,” he said softly, squeezing her even closer. “Friends can snuggle, can’t they?”

Rey found herself bringing her arm around his back, then rested her head on his shoulder as they walked along.

“Yeah,” she whispered, feeling amazingly content and comforted. “I guess they can.”

December 21 - Matching Pajamas

It was their first Christmas living together, and Rey was excited for Christmas Eve, when the two of them would open their presents, both the ones sent by friends and family, and those they had gotten for each other. Rey could already picture it. They would light the fire, and then turn off all the lights except those on the tree they had decorated together just after Thanksgiving. Having grown up in foster homes and orphanages, Christmas had always been a touchy holiday. While she always got a present or two from whoever her guardian was at the time, she never really felt the joy and excitement she had always believed most children felt around Christmas. But this year, she was as giddy at the little girl that she had never had a chance to be.

They were planning on going to Poe’s father’s house the next day for Christmas dinner, but the night before it would be just the two of them, and that was more than enough for Rey. She had long ago learned that spending time with one person who she loved and trusted was far better than spending time with a dozen acquaintances.

After dinner that night, as she finished clearing off the table and loading the dishwasher (whenever Poe cooked, Rey cleaned), Poe came into the kitchen with a shit-eating grin on his face and a brightly decorated gift bag in his hand.

Rey was confused. “I thought we weren’t going to open presents until later?”

“We aren’t,” Poe confirmed. “This is special. You need to open it before we start the unwrapping tonight.”

Rey gave him a wary look. “I don’t trust you when you smile like that.”

Poe looked offended. “There are times you don’t trust me? Like when?”

“Like when you smile like that,” Rey explained. “It always means something’s about to happen that is going to embarrass me.” Like the time he started twerking to ‘Big and Juicy’ when they were at Rose and Finn’s engagement party. Or when he starting singing New Rules on the Karaoke stage at the Tavern; it didn’t matter that they weren’t having Karaoke that night, nor that he was really good.

Poe looked around the room, wide-eyed. “Is there anyone here to be embarrassed in front of?” he asked. “It can’t be me. I’m the guy you fart on, remember?”

She smacked his arm. “Shut up!” she said, laughing. “What’s in the bag?”

“Are you sure you want to know? I don’t want to embarrass you!”

“Poe!”

“All right, all right!” He handed her the bag.

Cautiously, she took out the tissue paper on the top, then peered inside. It looked like… a blanket?

She reached in and pulled whatever it was out. It wasn’t a blanket. The green material was soft to the touch, and was decorated with images of Christmas: Santa, presents in red wrapping, candy canes, and snowflakes. She pulled the whole length of material out and shook it, revealing a complete, adult sized, onesie. With feet.

“Footie pajamas?” she asked. Poe knew she liked to sleep in soft, sleeveless nightshirts, her feet bare.

“Look! Look!” Poe exclaimed. He rushed out of the room, then came back in holding an identical pair of pajamas. “We can match!” He grinned.

Rey stared at him. He looked so genuinely happy, but she was flabbergasted.

“I… I…”

“No one else is gonna see us, Rey,” he told her, his smile fading just a little. “Come on! Just while we open presents tonight. For me?”

Damn it. He was giving her that puppy dog look.

“All right,” she said through clenched teeth. “But there better be alcohol involved, too.”

Poe jumped up and down a bit. “Of course!” he agreed. “Enough alcohol, I can maybe talk you into a cute little matchy-match selfie!”

“In your dreams, Dameron.”

“Nope!” he denied. “That will be after we open presents.” He leaned in to whisper in her ear, his voice suddenly dropping in timbre. “When I assist you out of your footie pajamas for the night.”

Rey shivered. “Keep talking like that, and I just might agree to that selfie,” Rey teased.

“Count on it.”

Continued in Part Two