Blind Faith - Part Two

As Rey and Poe begin a new journey together, Rey's hopes and dreams are realized. But will some things be too good to be true?

NC-17 for Intense and Explicit Sexual Content

They took their time over dinner, neither of them seeming to be in a hurry. The food was good, the service pleasant, and the company absolutely perfect. Of course, Rey had decided she was biased on that front. The more she got to know this man, the more she craved his company. It wasn’t just a girlie crush on an equestrian hero anymore. Poe Dameron was an amazing man beyond his talent and fame, and she was going to enjoy every bit of time she could with him, whether at the barn or away from it. And she had to admit, she hoped there would be plenty of moments away from it after this.

While she loved their shared devotion to horses and dressage, she felt that if there was any chance at a real relationship, they needed to find common ground elsewhere. So far, they had similar tastes in music, which was eclectic to say the least. They also liked many of the same books, although Poe did read more biographies while Rey was unashamed to delve into straight romance every once in a while. Their taste in movies was also similar, though again Rey would rather watch an emotional, angsty romance over a war movie, but she could still enjoy the war movie.

Long after their table had been cleared and they felt they should probably give it up to other diners, Poe suggested they take a walk by the river. Feeling almost giddy, Rey agreed. Obviously, Poe didn’t want the night to end, either. He led her to the rest rooms on the way out, and Rey had to use her cane for the first time in order to navigate the unfamiliar (but thankfully small) ladies’ room. Poe was waiting for her when she was done, and once more she folded up her cane and happily took hold of his arm. Together they walked out into the soft, muggy Savannah night. The restaurant was located along the Herb River, which was a branch of the Wilmington River, which was a branch of the Savannah River. You were never far from water here in Savannah, with the ocean itself just a few miles away.

“No cane tonight?” she asked as he directed her down the steps to the parking lot.

“I took it easy today, and so far, my back feels good,” he answered. “We’ll see how it is tomorrow,” he added wryly. He often complained that good days seemed to lead to extra bad days.

There was no walkway by the river, but the road the restaurant was on was fairly quiet, with a residential neighborhood on the other side, and marshland found in between the few houses that stood along the riverbank. Rey breathed deeply the smell of the water and marshland, listening to the many crickets, frogs, and cicadas that sang. She tilted her head. “Has the sun set completely?” she asked her companion.

“Mostly,” he informed her. “You can still see a bit of light in the west. The stars are brilliant tonight.”

“Not so many unnatural lights on this side of town, huh?”

“Yeah,” Poe confirmed after a slight pause. Rey was pretty sure he had nodded, then remembered she couldn’t see him. “Too much marshland down here. More houses than businesses.”

“Amilyn’s place is just a couple of blocks away,” Rey mentioned. That was how she had discovered Pearl’s. She had boarded BeeBee with Amilyn for a couple of years before moving him to a smaller facility closer to Jakku, but even then, she had still trailered him up twice a week for lessons. “She wasn’t too thrilled when I left her for you,” she mused.

“I bet she wasn’t,” Poe grumbled.

“You don’t like her any more than she likes you, I take it?”

“Don’t get me wrong,” Poe disclosed. “I think Ami is a great trainer and I’m glad you were able to ride under her for as long as you did. But yeah, she and I will never be on the same wavelength.”

“How come?” Rey pushed. When she heard Poe sigh, she almost took her question back. It was too personal. But then she reminded herself that if they were going to be more than friends, ‘personal’ was going to have to become shared. She waited.

“She and I slept together, several times, while she was training me.”

Poe’s answer was not what Rey had expected. She was struck speechless for a moment.

“It’s the main reason I have such a strict policy in my own operation,” he continued. “Amilyn didn’t have that kind of guideline and I was too young and full of myself to care.” He paused again, and Rey could feel his gaze on her.

She swallowed nervously, but tilted her head in his direction. “How old were you?” she asked quietly.

“Not a minor,” he told her. “Barely.” He took a deep breath. “She was located in Wellington at the time. I had a horse named Artie then.”

“Arts and Letters,” Rey confirmed. “I remember reading about him. He was a Thoroughbred, wasn’t he?”

“Yeah, and you know how much Ami doesn’t care for Thoroughbreds.” His voice was wry. “Ami helped me find Dee and imported him from Germany. It was the start of our journey together, and I’ll always be thankful to Ami for that. But in the end, she was just using me, and when I figured that out and left to ride with Justin Hardin, she got vindictive. Threatened to accuse me of sleeping with her in exchange for training.”

“Oh, my God!” Rey gasped.

“She didn’t, of course,” Poe quickly emphasized. “It was just a threat because she was hurt. It would have ruined her reputation as well as mine. I think she really cared about me, but I was so far from committing back then, even honesty from her wouldn’t have gotten me to stay.” He huffed another breath. “The fact is, Rey, I fooled around with a lot of women in those early days. It was easy. There aren’t that many straight guys in the dressage circuit, and dressage girls are always hot for a guy who can ride.”

Rey felt her face heat, but she also couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m not going to deny that,” she muttered.

Poe laughed with her.

“Is that why you’re not married,” Rey asked suddenly. “Because you can’t commit? You… you don’t believe in it?”

“I’ve grown up since then, Rey,” he explained. “When I started competing internationally, I focused more on my riding and less on women. Not to say I was chaste, but it wasn’t a priority. And since the accident… I’m not-” He paused, and Rey felt his hand cover hers as it rested on his arm. “It’s not that I don’t believe in marriage or commitment. It’s that I believe in it so much that I don’t want to make a mistake. I don’t want to be a statistic in an article on divorce. I want the real deal, and I’ve never met a woman that I felt could give me that.”

Rey felt her throat get thick as she struggled for a humorous reply, but then his fingers tightened on hers.

“Until you.”

Rey stopped and felt Poe turn to face her as she dropped his arm. She blinked rapidly, feeling tears of both relief and fear fill her eyes. Poe cupped her face with both of his hands. “Does that scare you?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, almost hard to hear over the sounds of the night around them. “It scares me, but in a good way.”

Rey took a deep breath, still unable to respond.

Poe continued. “I know you’re young, Rey, and are probably thinking you shouldn’t have to be making this kind of commitment at your age…”

“No!” she finally said, finding her voice. “It’s the opposite, actually.” Taking a deep breath of her own, she continued. “I feel I’ve waited my whole life for you. And it’s just hard for me to comprehend that you might be feeling the same way.”

“I am,” he confirmed. “But we don’t have to rush it,” he stated. “We still have a lot to learn about each other outside of the barn and arena.” She could hear the smile in his voice.

Rey laughed. “So, we’re gonna try this?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he responded. “We’re going to try this!” Still holding her face in his hands, he moved in to kiss her, slowly, letting her know what he was doing before he actually did it.

Rey didn’t need the alert. She happily accepted his kiss, opening her mouth greedily and meeting his tongue with her own. She brought her arms up and slid her hands over his shoulders and around his neck while he dropped his hands down and wrapped his arms around her back, squeezing her in close.

They kissed, under the stars, with the night sounds loud around them, for an indeterminant time, until a car came upon them. Rey didn’t see the headlights, but she felt Poe pull back and could hear the car coming. The driver gave a short little ‘honk’ that made them laugh.

“I better get you home,” Poe told her as they turned back toward the restaurant. “Now we’ve got to come up with a plan to ensure your father doesn’t kill me.”

Rey laughed.

******

“Are you ready?” Poe asked.

“As we’ll ever be,” Rey responded as she cued BeeBee into a trot.

Poe stood in the very center of the ‘practice’ arena, a separate area from the covered arena, that was set off in one of the pastures. It was a full dressage arena, 20 by 60 meters in size, with random letters spaced around the outer edge, and it sat next to a group of cypress trees with a slough sitting behind them, providing some distraction for the horses. It was meant to prepare both horse and rider for actual competition, getting them out of the enclosed training space they often got too comfortable with.

A dressage test required horse and rider to do certain gaits/movements from letter to letter, and that was the only problem Rey now faced with her blindness as she wouldn’t be able to see those letters. Today they were testing out how Rey could successfully compete with Poe being her ‘letter guide.’ He was standing in the very center of the arena, where the invisible letter ‘X’ was, and he would call out each letter as Rey and Bee neared it, allowing Rey to know where she was in the arena. The tests themselves she would have to memorize, something that had never been a problem for her. The test they were practicing on today was a low-level test, almost a beginner one, and they both knew BeeBee would be very confused by the easy movements, but Poe wasn’t about to start big; he wanted to set Rey up for success.

“Turn,” he said loudly. There was no sound system out here, so he would have to almost shout in order for Rey to hear him. As she turned the corner on the outside of the arena and neared the open ‘gate’ at the end, he called out “A!” Rey and BeeBee turned a little too sharp to the left, entering the opening at the end of the arena and facing Poe. They continued trotting down the centerline, BeeBee’s ears pricked toward Poe. He could tell the horse was wondering why he was standing in the middle of the arena. Bee’s gait slowed a bit as he neared Poe, and he could see Rey scrunch up her face a bit as she gently encouraged the horse to keep going. As they got closer, Poe said “X” and stepped to the side, cane in hand today. Rey halted BeeBee right where Poe had been standing, then dropped her right hand along her thigh, nodding to the invisible judge that would be sitting straight in front of them, right behind the letter ‘C.’ Bee was giving him a side-eye, still very confused as to what Poe was doing.

After her salute, Rey cued Bee back into a trot. Poe stepped back in the center, turning and watching them carefully. He was not allowed to critique or school either of them while they performed a test; he was only allowed to call out the letters as she neared them. As they got close to the end of the arena, he called out ‘C,’ and Rey directed Bee to the left. Either she had waited too long to cue him or Poe had called out the letter too late, because Bee got too close to the small white fence surrounding the arena and clipped it with his front right leg. He skipped a bit in annoyance and flicked his tail high. Rey winced, but kept him going.

Poe didn’t call out when she got to the corner. This is why he had her practice 10 meter circles over and over again, because then she would be able to ‘feel’ when the turn was supposed to be, and despite their mistake on the turn at the letter, they made the corner of the arena just fine. Immediately after they made that turn, however, Poe called out “H!” Rey turned left ever so slightly, putting Bee on the diagonal and straightening him out, asking him to trot out with longer strides. Once more, they were heading directly for Poe, and BeeBee looked at him again, his expression irritated now. Poe couldn’t help but grin. “X,” he shouted, then stepped aside, letting them trot by. BeeBee flicked his tail as they passed, almost as if he was giving Poe the finger. “F,” Poe called out, still smiling, watching as Rey sat deep and Bee slowed down to turn right into the corner.

They continued on like this through the whole test, both Rey and Poe figuring out just how close Rey needed to be to the letter for Poe to call it out, giving Rey enough time to respond. Twice more Rey turned Bee too late and he skipped to avoid hitting the fence, kicking out violently one of those times. His attitude made Poe laugh, and even Rey’s tight expression relaxed into a smile after that. Finally, they trotted down the centerline one last time.

“X,” Poe said as he stepped aside and BeeBee halted right next to him, his ears back and a disgruntled look on his face. Rey let out a big sigh; Poe had noticed her holding her breath more than once during the ride, but as per the rules, he couldn’t say anything to remind her to breathe.

“Well, you survived,” Poe said. It had been messy and wouldn’t have received a very good score if it had been judged, but seeing as it was their first time practicing this, he thought they had fared quite well. They had done everything right, it just hadn’t been very pretty.

Rey tilted her head at him. “This isn’t gonna be easy, is it?”

“Did you really expect it to be?” he asked her as he stepped up to Bee’s head. Rey had dropped her reins and the gelding, knowing the test was done, was relaxed now and started to happily rub his face on Poe’s shoulder, getting slobber all over his shirt.

Rey shrugged. “I don’t know,” she admitted. “I guess I had hoped it would just come back to us both, and it would be just as if nothing had changed.” She reached down and started scratching Bee’s shoulder. “Silly, huh?”

“You know what?” Poe answered. “I think that once we figure out a good rhythm with me calling out the letters, it will come back to you. You both know how to do this, you just need to relearn how to ‘see’ the arena. You’ll get there.”

Rey nodded, her expression a bit lighter now. “Let’s get back,” he said, then pushed against Bee’s head a bit, making the horse turn around so they could head back out of the arena at the gap. As they walked toward the barn, Poe found himself leaning on his cane heavily and began to think about the heating pad in his office. He knew Rey would be fine to untack Bee by herself and groom him, so he could sit for a while before helping her take the horse out to the south pasture for the night. Then he could bring the heating pad with him to the porch so they could sit and talk for a while, something they still did after every lesson.

Now that they were officially dating, they did things most every night together. Movies, dinner, visits to the park, and of course trail riding. Thursday nights, when Rey ate out with her father, were the only nights Rey and Poe hadn’t done something together for the last month. Though they weren’t keeping their new relationship a secret, they waited until Poe’s lessons were done for the day and all the students had left the property before going out. The rumors were unavoidable, but so far there had been no nastiness on the part of Poe’s clients or the other residents of Jakku. The fact was, this past month had been amazing.

Once at the barn, Rey dismounted and Poe headed for his office, telling her to give a shout when she was ready to turn BeeBee out to pasture. His back was screaming and he sat in his chair with a groan, closing his eyes as he turned on the heating pad. He thought about taking a pain pill, but he still had to drive Rey home. His mind wandered toward Rey and the brief talk they had had after her lesson on Wednesday. Poe had determined that there should be no second guessing or miscommunication in their fledgling romance, so he had asked her outright if she had any experience with sex; they had done nothing more than kiss and cuddle since their first date, and Poe wasn’t going to ask for more until he knew what she was comfortable with.

“I’m not a virgin,” she had said firmly, but she kept her eyes averted. “But… there was only one time and… it wasn’t good.”

Poe hadn’t pushed for more, but he wondered now if maybe he should have. Would she open up to him when she was ready, or had whatever happened her first time been so traumatic she was trying to forget it?

“Poe?”

Rey’s soft voice made him jerk and he opened his eyes to see her standing in the doorway.

He looked at the clock on the wall and realized more than twenty minutes had passed since he had sat down. “I’m sorry!” he said, wincing as he stood. His back spasmed slightly. “Did you call for me?”

She shook her head. “No!” she said. “I just grabbed my cane and took him out there myself.” She shrugged self-consciously. “I’ve walked that route every day all summer. Bee took care of me.”

Despite his discomfort, Poe felt pride fill him. He loved seeing her become more confident and more independent.

She took a deep breath. “Is there something I can do for your back?” she asked suddenly. “Like massage it or something?”

He didn’t even question how she knew he was hurting. She had commented more than once that she could tell how he was feeling by the sound of his footsteps. She knew when he was using his cane and how heavily he leaned on it when he did have it.

“I…” he started.

“Massaging helps, doesn’t it?” she pressed.

“Yeah,” he answered.

“Then let’s get up to the house and let me try and help you.”

The thought of her strong, graceful hands on his lower back both excited and comforted him. He knew without a doubt a back rub would help relax his painful muscles, but he also knew the woman giving it might cause tension in other parts of his body.

“Okay,” he told her softly. “Let’s go.”

******

Rey kept hold of Poe’s arm as they made their way from the barn to his little house. Once on the porch, she let him go and moved ahead of him; she was as comfortable on this porch as she was in her bedroom, now. She moved to one of the chairs she knew sat around the small glass table and pulled it up to the chaise. “Lay down,” she told him firmly. “On your belly.” She paused as she sat in the chair. “Maybe take your shirt off?”

“That sounds a little dangerous, Rey,” he responded, his voice deeper than normal.

“Human touch is very healing,” she told him primly. “I can work your muscles better if there is no barrier between us.” There was a long pause, and Rey could tell he was not moving. “Are you scared of me, Dameron?” she asked quietly.

“Yes, actually,” he said. “I am.”

Rey felt her heart race, but then she heard him take a deep breath and the sound of him pulling off his t-shirt registered. She felt him move closer and sit on the chase, then situate himself, she assumed the way she had asked. She scooted the chair closer and reached out tentatively. Warm skin met her fingertips. Trying not to think too much, she felt carefully along his back, mapping it. She felt the dip of his spine, the edges of the lower part of his shoulder blades, the points at the top, and the dimples on his lower back that sat just above the waistband of his jeans.

The smile she knew was on her face faded when her fingers met the scars. They were small, subtle, probably not even easily visible to the naked eye, but her heightened sense of touch allowed her to feel them. Her mind raced as she tried to determine what his back must have looked like after his accident, but logic told her the scars were not from the car hitting him, that most likely he had not had any external injuries other than bruising and road rash. These scars were from the surgery that had repaired, or attempted to repair, the damage done internally. Taking a deep breath, she continued with her explorations.

Once she felt comfortable with the terrain, she began to work her fingers gently into his tense muscles, gradually putting more pressure into her kneading. She stayed silent, listening carefully to his breathing, able to tell by his unconscious sounds where it felt good or where it hurt. Slowly, he began to relax underneath her ministrations, and she relaxed into it as well.

“You’re good at this,” he mumbled, startling her.

“I wish I could see you,” she whispered back, her voice catching.

“You see me better than anybody ever has, Rey.”

Her breath caught at his words, and she paused, blinking back the sudden moisture in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she continued with the massage, working along his lower back, where she knew most of his pain was situated. She hesitated for a moment when she hit his beltline, but then carefully slid underneath the waistband just a bit with her thumbs, hitting the pressure points she knew were used during acupuncture, and working her way up along his spine. He groaned, but she could tell it wasn’t in pain.

“Where did you learn that?” he asked, his voice muffled.

“I took an acupressure class my first year out of High School,” she told him. “Easy A. Made my dad think I might go into nursing or massage therapy or something.” She paused as she continued working along his spine. “All I really wanted to do was ride.” After manipulating all along his lower back, she continued to massage the muscles, noting how malleable they now were after the gentle prodding. She herself felt as if her own muscles had become lax.

Her thoughts drifted back to Poe’s question the other night. The question she had dodged. The question about sex.

“When I was sixteen, I fell in love,” she started. She felt him become more alert underneath her hands. “Or thought it was love,” she amended. “He was a year older than I was. We were both riding with Amilyn.” Knowing she had his attention, she continued. “We didn’t really date. Between school and riding, we really didn’t have time to date. But we would watch movies on his laptop in the tack room after lessons, and sneak out by the slough to make out after dark. He informed me more than once that he was ‘experienced.’ But, I guess ‘experienced’ doesn’t necessarily mean ‘good’.”

She heard movement and knew Poe had turned his head to face her. She continued with the massage as she talked. “He had no clue about foreplay,” she said, letting some snark into her voice. "I was far from ready when he…” she cleared her throat. “It hurt. A lot. I started crying and he panicked and pulled out, sure that he had damaged Amilyn’s best student. That I would never ride again.” She laughed, remembering the horror on his face when he saw the blood. “Needless to say, we broke up. He never could look me in the eye again after that.”

Rey stopped with her massage and leaned back in the chair. She could hear Poe move and knew he was sitting up, swinging his legs around so he could face her.

She licked her lips and shrugged. “I’ve never trusted anyone enough to get that close again,” she said softly. “It didn’t bother me. I was so focused on riding that I didn’t have much time for social activities, and as there aren’t a lot of men in dressage, I never had to worry about being distracted. Until you.” She snorted a laugh. “You distracted me like no one ever has. But I knew any romance was a pipe dream, so I let myself fantasize, but nothing more. Not only did I know you would never allow yourself to look at me as more than a student, but you would never look at me like that even if I wasn’t.”

She felt his hand come up to cup her cheek, a gesture that was becoming more and more familiar to her. “But, I do,” he whispered. His thumb began to brush gently along her lower lip, and without thought she opened her mouth, catching the tip between her teeth. The action caused the subtle pulsing that had begun between her legs the moment she had touched his bare back to become not so subtle, and his soft moan only added fuel to the fire.

After a soft suck, she released his thumb. “Make love to me, Poe,” she told him, her voice sounding more confident than she felt. But she was determined. They had waited long enough.

“We don’t need to rush this, Rey,” was his response.

Giving him a soft smile, she answered, “Oh, I know you won’t rush.”

He laughed, then moved his hand to the back of her head, leaning forward to kiss her. She responded without any hesitation, already loving his kisses and knowing exactly what he liked in return. Suddenly, he leaned back and stood, grasping her elbows and pulling her up with him. “I think a shower is in order, first,” he said, his voice husky.

“Separate or together?” Rey asked, a bit breathless.

“Well, we’ve gotta save water,” he replied, tucking her hand under his arm as had become habit when he guided her. “So, together, of course.”

“Of course,” Rey smiled, and he led her into the house.

******

Poe led Rey into his house, realizing as he did so that she had never been inside; they always spent their time together out on the porch. Even though he knew she couldn’t see, he was glad that he had cleaned recently. With his heart racing, he led her to his bedroom, flipping on only necessary lights as they went, and to the connecting bathroom. He stopped, touched her hand and whispered, “Wait here,” then moved to start the shower, watching her carefully. Her eyes were bright, excited, her breathing faster than normal. She bit her bottom lip and swallowed nervously.

He felt the temperature of the water, waiting for it to get warm but not hot; though his AC worked well, he didn’t think a hot shower appealed to either of them after such a warm day. Once it was a good temp, he moved back over to Rey. She licked her lips restlessly, but her eyes were eager. Gently, he took hold of her wrists in both hands. Slowly, he slid his fingers up her bare arms, then back down. She closed her eyes, a small smile appearing on her lips. He brought his hands to the hem of her tank top, his movements deliberate. Carefully, he began to pull the top upward.

Without hesitation, Rey raised her arms up above her head, assisting Poe as he continued to pull her tank up and off. As he let the shirt fall to the ground, his eyes dropped down to her bare breasts. He knew she rarely wore a bra, snarking that she didn’t need one for support and they were just too hot and uncomfortable when riding. He swallowed as he stared. “Beautiful,” he breathed.

She huffed a soft laugh, her cheeks rosy. “I’m too small,” she once more complained.

“Who says?” Poe argued. “I think they’re perfect.” He lifted his eyes back to her face. “Can I touch you?”

She nodded, once more biting her lower lip.

Poe brought his hands up, but instead of cupping the soft flesh before him, he let the backs of his fingers trail along the inside curves, then slid them underneath, feeling the dampness of her sweat. He let his thumbs come up to brush against her nipples, smiling as she gasped, then moaned.

His own heart started beating madly, and he could feel his jeans tighten almost unbearably. “Okay,” he panted. “Let’s move this to the shower,” he told her gruffly. This was going to happen way too fast if he didn’t slow it down now. He stepped back and began to unbuckle his belt. She also worked at the fastener on her breeches. Poe had to sit on the lid of the toilet to pull off his boots, but Rey was able to easily slide her stretchy riding pants off, pulling the boot socks and sneakers off along with them, while balancing on her feet. Poe envied her flexibility while trying not to let his mind wander to the possibilities her suppleness inspired. Within seconds, they were both naked.

Carefully, he reached for her hand again, leading her over to the shower. “Step,” he said softly after he opened the door, raising her hand slightly as had become habit when she needed to step up or over something. She moved into the shower, her breath catching as the water hit her. “Is the temp okay?” he asked as he followed her in, closing the door behind him.

She nodded. “Yeah,” she breathed. “Perfect.”

Poe reached for the bottle of body wash on the shelf, pausing as he did so. Its scent was earthy and rich, more masculine than the floral scented stuff he knew Rey used. He opened the top and handed it to her. “Is this scent okay?” he asked. “I have bars of Irish Spring, too.”

She sniffed it and smiled. “It smells like you,” she told him. “Which is very okay with me.”

He nodded, then took the bottle back, pouring some onto his palm before setting it aside. Rubbing his hands together to work up a lather, he moved closer to Rey. “I’m going to touch you again,” he told her softly.

She nodded, her eyes flashing, her breathing still fast. Starting with her shoulders, Poe began to wash her, letting his hands move over her bare wet skin, trying to move quickly but enjoy the ride at the same time. He watched as her eyes closed, then she reached past him to feel along the shelf, finding the bottle easily. She paused, and he knew she was waiting to make sure she had the right one, knowing he would correct her if she had grabbed the shampoo. When he said nothing, she opened it and squeezed some into her hand. Putting the bottle back, she started lathering up the soap, stopping briefly as his hands ran over her breasts. Then she began to wash him. “You know,” she said. “This would go a lot faster if we had wash cloths.”

“We don’t need to go faster,” Poe mumbled, shivering as her hands ran along his chest and down his stomach. He turned before she got too far and felt her massage his back once more while he quickly used more soap to wash his half-erect penis. He wasn’t going to let her do that quite yet; he wanted this to last. Although with her hands currently smoothing along his ass, that was easier said than done. As he spun himself around under the water, rinsing, he told her softly, “Turn around.”

She did as he asked and he grabbed more soap and began to lather up her back, letting his hands run down her spine to her narrow waist and firm buttocks. Riding at the level she was every day produced an amazingly tight body; he felt a moment of nostalgia as he recalled how fit he had been when he was competing. Not that he was unfit now, but he no longer had the six pack abs and toned butt that upper-level competition had given him.

After ensuring all the day’s sweat and grime had been rinsed from them both, he moved to stand behind her. She tilted her head to the side and he accepted the invitation and began to softly kiss and lick along her neck. Her hair was still in a ponytail, but he could feel the loose strands that had escaped during the day tickle his nose. He brought his hands around to her front, cupping her breasts and squeezing them gently before letting his hands slide downward. Wrapping one arm around her belly, he let his other hand slip between her thighs. The moisture his fingers found was not from the shower or from sweat. She gasped. “Oh, my, Rey,” he whispered in her ear. “You really need to be washed down here. Please let me do it.”

She whined and moved her hips, thrusting them into his hand. “Yes,” she gasped.

“Let me play with you first, though,” he continued.

“Oh, God, yes!” Rey panted.

Smiling, he began to finger her folds, running his index finger up and down along the edges of her pussy, holding her tight with his other arm as she began to undulate her hips. He felt more of her juices flood over his fingers and he responded by inserting his middle finger inside her. She moaned and he began to pump into her, reveling in her heat and tightness. He added another finger, letting his thumb rub against her clit, but then reminded himself to take it slow. She may have had intercourse when she was sixteen, but she was still in his mind a virgin.

“Do you touch yourself, Rey?” he asked as he continued to finger fuck her.

Gasping, she nodded.

“Do you use toys?” His mind was already imagining her lying on her bed masturbating.

“I…” she started. “I used to. Before I had to move back in with my father. I’m too scared he’ll hear.”

“But you still touch yourself?” She nodded. “What do you think about when you touch yourself, Rey?" he pushed, his fingers moving faster now.

“You!” she breathed. “Always you.”

“Oh, fuck!” Poe groaned, burying his face in her neck. He moved his fingers quickly now, pulsing them in and out of her. He could feel her thighs start to spasm and her knees clamped together as she cried out.

“Oh, God!” she shouted, her body bending over slightly at the waist as she came hard. He held her firmly, bringing her up tighter against him, reveling in her body’s response to his ministrations.

He continued to pump his fingers into her, the wet sucking sounds making him harder and harder as his own arousal grew. Her orgasm lasted for several seconds and he couldn’t stop the feeling of smugness that overcame him. Finally, her body seemed to droop, and he brought his fingers out of her now dripping core, cupping her gently as she shivered and tried to catch her breath.

Slowly, as she began to straighten once again, he turned her to face the water. He reached his hand up, rinsing it under the stream, then grabbed the showerhead and brought it out from its holder. Carefully, he directed the water between her legs, using the hand that had been holding on to her to gently wash away her slick. His cock was throbbing, waiting excitedly for its turn, but it would have to wait a little longer.

Rey suddenly stiffened. “Poe! Your back!”

He chuckled. “It feels fine, Sunshine,” he assured her. “It’s probably a good thing you’re almost the same height as me; I don’t have to bend over to kiss you.” As he replaced the showerhead and turned off the water, she spun around to face him, bringing her lips to his.

He kissed her, long and deep and slow, then backed away slightly. “Let’s move this into the bedroom, shall we?”

Her eyes still dazed, Rey nodded. “Let’s.”

******

Rey felt like she was in a dream.

Still riding the high from her orgasm, the strongest she had ever had, she found herself being led into Poe’s bedroom after a quick towel dry. He directed her to the bed and she sat on it, facing where she knew he was standing.

“I want to ‘see’ you, Poe,” she told him softly.

She heard him take a deep breath, then she felt the bed move as he crawled upon it. She followed him, waiting as he situated himself on his back, then she reached out carefully, finding his arm. She got up on her knees and moved forward until she was right next to him, then sat on her heels and leaned over him, letting her hands explore. First his chest, which she knew from her washing him in the shower was hairless and smooth. She let her fingers trail over his nipples, smiling as she felt his body jerk in reaction. She leaned further and brought her hands up to run over his shoulders, then down his sides. He grunted. “I’m not ticklish,” he told her, and she could hear the smile in his voice. “But if you keep doing that, I may not be responsible for my actions.”

She giggled a bit, then brought her hands back to his sternum. She smoothed them downward, over his belly, which was flat but still had a pleasant softness to it. She knew Poe exercised as much as his back allowed and was a stickler about his diet, but the fact he wasn’t perfectly hard and defined actually comforted her; that kind of perfectionism had always scared her.

It wasn’t long after this thought that her hand ran into his erection, which was laying hard and defined, on his belly. “Oh!” she said, surprised. She knew how male sexuality worked, of course, but she hadn’t been expecting to encounter his penis so soon in her exploration. Which was silly, she thought. As aroused as he had made her in the shower, he had to have become just as aroused. Carefully, she grasped his shaft in one hand, her other hand sliding down to fondle his testicles.

“Careful, sweetheart,” she heard him grumble, his voice tight.

She paused. “Am I hurting you?”

“Not the way you’re thinking,” he responded.

She smiled. “So, will it make you feel better if I do this?” She leaned over, bringing her mouth down and wrapping her lips around the tip of his cock.

“Ah, fuck!” he cried as his hips rose off the bed. “Rey, please don’t tease right now! I’m honestly not sure how much longer I can hold off!”

Straightening up, Rey grinned. “All right. But you better let me do a more thorough exam in the future.”

“Absolutely!” he agreed. “But for now…” he paused. “Shit!”

“What?” she asked, immediately noticing the change in his voice.

He pulled away from her. “I’ll be right back!” She heard him slide off the other side of the bed, his footsteps taking him out of the room.

Confused, Rey sat on her heels, wondering what she should do, but she didn’t have to wait long. She heard him reenter the room, the crinkling of a plastic bag hitting her ears. “I bought these a few weeks ago but just left them in the bag on the counter,” he said. She felt the bed move as he kneeled on it again.

Rey felt another smile form. “Let me guess. Condoms?”

“Yep,” he told her, and she could hear him messing with the package.

“I hope that’s a big box,” she teased.

He huffed a laugh. “Six,” he told her, and she could hear the box hit the stand by the bed as he tossed it over. “But I know where to get more.”

“Good,” she mumbled as she moved close to him once more. He met her with a kiss, then fell back on the bed, bringing her with him. He released her for a moment, and she knew he was putting the condom on. She brought her hand down, trying to feel what he was doing without getting in his way. He grasped her hand and directed it back to his now covered erection.

He brought his hands back up to run along her sides and back. “Ride me,” he whispered against her lips.

Nodding, Rey brought her leg over him, straddling him. She moved her body down, grasping his cock once more and lining him up with her pussy, which she knew was dripping with her own juices. Her heart was racing, and her nervousness started to grow, her memory of the pain from her one encounter causing her to tense up. She was sure it would hurt. But not as much, she comforted herself. Unlike that time, her body was ready and willing.

However, her explorations had proved that Poe was much larger than Dex had been.

Taking a deep breath, she lowered herself onto him. His entry felt amazing and for a moment she felt as if she was about to orgasm again. Then the pressure changed. She tensed, but then felt Poe’s hands grasp her hips, his thumbs gently massaging her just in front of her hipbones.

“Relax,” he told her, his voice mesmerizing. “You’re in charge, Rey. Take your time.”

She continued to sink down, the pressure still intense, but there was no pain. A feeling of euphoria began to overtake her as she realized she was taking him all… and that it didn’t hurt one bit. “Oh, God,” she whispered in awe.

“Are you okay?”

She smiled and nodded her head. “Oh, yes!” she breathed. “I was afraid it was going to hurt, but it feels amazing!”

“Tell me what you’re feeling, Rey,” Poe demanded softly. “Let me know, with words or sounds, what you like.”

“Full,” she responded. “But in a good way. The pressure is… I can’t describe it. How it can feel so good, I don’t understand.” She moved her hips a bit and the feeling increased. “I want to move,” she said. “I need to move.”

“Yes!” Poe hissed.

She began rocking her hips, slowly, twisting them slightly every now and then, as if she was trying to relieve an itch. The pleasure was intense and beyond anything she had ever imagined sex to be like.

“Fuck!” Poe groaned as if he was in pain.

“Tell me what you’re feeling, Poe,” she pushed. “Do you want me to do something different?”

“Fuck, no, sweetheart!” he gasped. “You are driving me crazy, but in such a good way.” His fingers tightened for a moment on her hips, then he let his hands slide up her body, his thumbs brushing her belly button, until they reached her breasts, which felt heavy and shockingly full. He cupped them and squeezed. “You’re so damn tight,” he muttered. “You’re fucking perfect.”

Rey let herself lean forward over him, her hands landing on his chest and sliding up his neck. He left her breasts and brought his hands around her back, running them down to cup her butt. She reached for his face so she could ‘see’ him. His beard stubble was rough on her fingers, his mouth was open as he breathed heavily, his eyes closed as she brushed over them. She found his mouth again and brought her lips to his. He responded with an almost aggressive kiss that made her core throb.

She started rocking faster, her tongue tangling with Poe’s. His fingers squeezed her ass and she responded by twisting her hips again. He groaned into her mouth. “You’re making me think you’ve done this before,” he said against her lips.

“Only in my dreams,” she whispered back.

His hands continued to roam as she continued to rock, their lips connecting over and over as their breathing increased. Eventually, she felt Poe’s hips start to move upward, meeting her forward undulations. She pushed herself away from him and sat upright once more, using her strong rider’s legs to lift herself up, then letting herself drop quickly. She cried out as the intensity increased even more, and her movements became stronger. Poe’s hands were once more on her hips, his fingers gripping her tightly, and he brought his own hips up to meet her thrusts. Rey cried out and continued to whine, wrapping her hands around his wrists, hanging on tight as she felt her orgasm come close but still out of reach. “God, Poe!” she shouted. “I can’t… it’s too… awwww!”

“Let go, baby,” Poe groaned. “Come for me!”

As if his words were a pin popping a balloon, she crested. Sparks of white and silver exploded in her mind’s eye as her body convulsed. She fell forward, bringing one of her hands out to land on Poe’s chest, catching herself as she continued to tremor. She felt his own body tighten underneath her and he shouted, “Fuck, yes!” His hips snapped up into her a few more times, then he seemed to collapse. Rey let herself drop down, breathing heavily, her face next to his. Immediately, his arms wrapped tight around her back, holding her close.

Rey was unsure how long they lay like that, slowly catching their breath, but finally she lifted her face and turned it toward him. “That was… wow.” She just didn’t have the brainpower to find any other word to use.

He cleared his throat. “Yeah,” he responded, his voice cracking. “Wow.”

Rey nuzzled his face and was startled when she felt moisture. Lifting her head higher, she brought a hand up to his cheek, running her fingers upward to find his face wet. “Poe?” she whispered. “Are you crying?” Just saying the words brought tears to her own eyes. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be crying,” she stuttered.

She heard him laugh softly. “I just…” he took a deep breath. “I love you so much, Rey.”

Her own tears leaking out of her eyes now, she brought her lips up to his cheek, intent on kissing his tears away. “I love you, too, Poe Dameron. I love you, too.”

******

Summer slowly slid into autumn, bringing shorter days and less oppressive heat. Rey began working remotely for her father’s firm, making appointments and answering questions over the phone, as well as managing the accounts. She started riding in the early mornings versus the evenings as the weather moderated, and this left her evenings free to work on her book, as well as the other two ‘works in progress’ that she told Poe she couldn’t stop thinking about.

In the middle of September, she left her father’s house and moved in with Poe.

This action caused more than a little discord at the barn, and even branched out into the local dressage community. Poe had two clients remove their children from his program, and two other parents complained, though they did nothing more than that. “She’s too young,” was the most common verbalized criticism, though “isn’t she a student?” was often asked, too. Those who knew them well, such as Finn and Rose, calmly defended them. Her father, though obviously unhappy with the arrangement, did not argue. Rey’s aunt, however, was more than happy to verbalize her opinion. “I am so happy for you guys!” she told them on her first visit to the barn after Rey moved in. “I do hope you plan to fill this little house with babies!”

“Aunt Leia!” Rey had responded, her face turning bright red. “It’s a little soon for that, don’t you think?”

After the initial shock of Leia’s words passed, Poe had laughed. While they hadn’t talked about it, the idea of having children with Rey was more than appealing. But she was right, it was a bit early to be thinking about such things.

Rey quickly became comfortable maneuvering around Poe’s little house, and the fact that she was just steps away from the barn, which she was already comfortable with, meant she was out and about with the horses whenever she wasn’t working. In early October, Poe took her to a doctor recommended by the United States Para Equestrian Association and she was officially assigned to the Grade IV Classification. The appointment also allowed Rey to receive a dispensation certificate with the United States Dressage Federation, permitting Poe to direct her from the center of the arena even at able-bodied dressage competitions. Her scores would go to both the USDF and the USPEA and would enable her to qualify for regional, national, and even international competitions.

Later that month, Rey and BeeBee showed for the first time since her accident.

Poe had three students showing at the same show, an annual event in Conyers, so Rose went with them to keep Rey company while Poe was busy with the other riders, one of which was Bobby Bliss. Surprisingly, Zorii had not been one of Poe’s clients who had been critical of Rey and Poe’s living arrangement, and seeing as this would be Bobby’s first dressage show, she was also keeping Rey company, chatting excitedly as she watched her son prepare his pony for his Training Level test. Poe wasn’t sure if Rey appreciated this or if she was just very good at being polite.

Finally, it was time for Rey’s test. He could tell she was nervous, and that had been a rare thing before her accident. Her confidence in not only herself but her horse had never wavered back when she could see, but today was a whole different story. Poe walked alongside BeeBee's head as her number was called. They had very little trouble in the warm-up arena, as most of the other riders avoided her in deference to her blindness. Poe was also very aware of the angry stares he was receiving from several of the ‘old guard,’ trainers and riders whom Poe had known for years who were not afraid to show their disapproval of Poe’s relationship with Rey.

One of those stares came from none other than Amilyn Holdo.

Poe did not say anything about what he was seeing to Rey, but he had an inkling she could sense some of the animosity around her. He glanced up at her atop her prancing horse, who was reacting excitedly to not only the show atmosphere but his rider’s nerves, and took a deep breath, releasing his own nervous energy.

The three of them entered the large arena. The dressage arena was in the center of the main arena, its white boarder fencing bright in the October sunlight, colorful flowers decorating every letter. Poe stopped and looked up at Rey as Bee stopped next to him. “Walk about ten strides, then turn right,” he told her. This would give him time to move to the center X. “Focus. The two of you have done this before. You’re just ‘seeing’ it different now.”

Rey took a deep breath and nodded. Poe stepped away and watched them as they walked forward, turning just past the outside corner of the arena. As soon as they entered the rectangular arena they would be under a judge’s scrutiny, but for now they could take time to settle themselves. Poe walked into the dressage arena and stopped at the center, then watched Rey as she collected BeeBee, using her reins and her body weight to bring her horse into a classical frame. They were riding a third level test today. It was close to the same test Grade IV riders would use in international competition, though Rey had ridden at a much higher level before her accident.

The bell rang. Rey and BeeBee had forty-five seconds to enter the arena and start the test. He watched as Rey turned Bee and moved him into a collected trot. “Corner!” Poe called out as she reached the corner, then “A!” shortly afterwards. Bee turned into the arena smoothly and headed directly for Poe. Bee was used to him sharing their arena space now and didn’t give him a second glance. He knew what was going on and how important it was, so he was completely focused on Rey. “X!” Poe said, then stepped aside. Bee stopped short, his weight moving to his hindquarters, making the halt smooth as silk. Poe saw Rey lick her lips and swallow as she saluted the judge she couldn’t see, then she took up her reins again and asked Bee to trot once more.

Poe continued to call out the letters as Rey and BeeBee danced through the test. About half-way through, Poe started getting excited. They were brilliant, as fluid and polished as if they hadn’t been away for months. He tempered his enthusiasm, reminding himself there was still plenty of time for mistakes.

But they made none.

After a little more than five minutes, Rey and BeeBee were trotting down the center line toward him once more. Instead of telling them where ‘X’ was, he stepped aside and called out “I” when they reached the point half-way between ‘X’ and ‘C’ at the end of the arena, the stopping point for this particular test. They halted, and Rey saluted once more.

Suddenly, a roar of applause sounded from behind Poe. He turned, startled, not realizing that almost everyone on the show grounds had come to watch Rey’s first ride back. Rey also turned her head toward the sound, her mouth open in astonishment. Grinning, Poe walked toward her. BeeBee was pulling at the reins, reminding Rey that the test was over and she needed to let them go as they needed to leave the arena on a loose rein. “Here,” Poe said loudly so he could be heard over the clapping and whistling.

Rey dropped her reins and let Bee turn to follow Poe. Poe looked up at Rey as she bit her lower lip, wiping tears off her face with her white glove. The crowd continued to applaud as they left the arena, and at the gate of the main arena, more than one person, many of them fellow riders, came to congratulate her. “That was amazing!” “You guys were great!” “It’s like you never left!” “Welcome back, Rey!”

Poe walked them back to the barn, unable to wipe the grin from his face as person after person congratulated Rey. BeeBee stopped in front of the stall he had been assigned for the show and Poe moved back and touched Rey on the knee. Without any warning, she threw her right leg over Bee’s neck and slid to the ground, right into Poe’s arms. He could hear Rose giggling as she walked up to take a hold of Bee. Holding her tight, uncaring about the press of her helmet against the side of his head, he felt tears of his own form in his eyes.

“Thank you, Poe,” Rey whispered. “Thank you!”

“Seventy One Point Two One Six!” Zorii cried, running up to them.

Rey pulled back and turned toward her. “What?” she asked, her voice shaky.

“71.216!” Zorii repeated. “Your score!”

“We got above seventy percent?” Rey asked, turning to Poe.

He laughed. “Sounds like you might have won the class.”

“Against riders who can see!” Zorii gushed. “Rey, that was amazing!”

Rey still looked stunned, but Poe wasn’t surprised.

And he wasn’t surprised the next day, when she again won her class with a 72.250%.

Rey’s confidence grew by leaps and bounds after that. She travelled with his two top students to Ocala two weeks later winning her third level test on the first day, then placing high with quality scores in two tests the next day, one of them a fourth level test. Just before Thanksgiving, Rey and Poe travelled alone with BeeBee to Wellington, where Rey competed in her first official Para Dressage competition. She won both classes easily, and the officials took notice. Almost immediately, whispers began to fly about their chances in the Paralympics, which were held after every Olympic Game in the same location.

One lead trainer commented that he knew of a fabulous Hanoverian stallion for sale that Rey would be a perfect match for. She shut down the man immediately. “BeeBee goes where I go,” she told him. “I do not need nor desire a new horse.”

The fact was, Rey was getting the attention Poe had always felt she deserved before she lost her eyesight.

While the idea of the possibility of her competing in the Paralympics excited him, Poe had more important things on his mind after Thanksgiving. One day the following week found him visiting a reputable jeweler in downtown Savannah. After much deliberation, he chose a 14k white gold diamond inlaid ring with one modest sized diamond in the center, twelve tiny diamonds surrounding it in a horseshoe shaped pattern, and eighteen more tiny diamonds, nine on each side, along the band. The inlay pattern would keep anything from catching on the diamonds, something he knew Rey would appreciate as she worked with BeeBee and the other horses.

Poe arrived home shortly before eight that evening and was surprised to see several cars parked near the house. One of them he recognized as Luke’s, but three others were unfamiliar. Upon entering the house, he saw Rey sitting in the living room with her father, her aunt Leia and uncle Han, Doctor Kanata, and a man he didn’t know.

Rey heard him and was instantly on her feet, moving toward him, a huge smile on her face, her eyes bright. “Poe! I’m so glad you’re here!” She turned toward the stranger, who had also risen and was walking toward him. “This is Doctor Krennic,” she said.

Poe shook the man’s outstretched hand.

“Doctor Krennic used to work with the Foundation Fighting Blindness,” Rey continued. “He’s developed a new laser technique that can help repair trauma to the occipital lobe of the brain.”

Poe stared at her, comprehension dawning.

“Poe, he can help me see again!”

******

Rey sat on the couch next to Poe, her fingers intwined with his, as she listened to Dr. Krennic explain the procedure a second time for Poe’s benefit. Her heart was racing and her whole body was thrumming with excitement. Only in her wildest dreams during her darkest times had she imagined something like this. It had to be a miracle that this man had developed this treatment less than a year after she was blinded.

“It’s basically laser therapy,” the doctor was saying. “It helps stimulate and encourage damaged tissue to repair itself. It’s been used externally for years, but I’ve developed a computer program that makes it much safer to use internally, as in the brain.”

“Much safer?” she heard Poe comment. “How safe?”

“Well, as with any kind of brain surgery, there is risk, and this procedure is still experimental,” Dr. Krennic explained. “But I have had complete success with three patients so far, and the odds will only improve the more experience I have.” She heard him sigh. “I know it doesn’t sound like great odds, but that’s why I’m seeking out volunteers privately, and not advertising, yet.”

Poe asked a few more basic questions, making Rey’s nerves spark even though she knew they were necessary. If she could, she would say ‘yes’ right now, but she knew she needed to at least pretend to think about it. Eventually, Dr. Krennic took his leave and Rey comfortably escorted him to the door, letting him know she would call with her answer as soon as possible.

She turned back toward the living room, where the most important people in her life sat.

Taking a deep breath, she said, “I want to do it.”

“We know you do, Rey,” she heard Leia say softly. “But let’s get all the facts, first.”

“We got all the facts from him,” Rey argued, waving her hand back toward the door where Krennic had exited.

“All the positive facts,” Dr. Kanata added.

Rey rolled her eyes. “I know there are some negatives, but if I can have even the slightest chance of being able to see again…” She walked back toward the couch, reaching out. Poe’s hand met hers and directed her to sit back down next to him.

“Rey, as soon as he called me asking about you, I did my research,” Maz told her. “I knew you needed to meet him and learn about what he was doing, despite what I found.”

“What did you find?” Her father’s voice was rough.

“The procedure has merit,” Maz continued. “But as he said, it’s risky. Playing around with the brain is always risky.” She took a deep breath. “So far, fifteen people have undergone the surgery, and only three have been successful.”

“So, the odds aren’t good,” Rey interrupted. “But it’s still worth the risk.”

“You haven’t let me tell you about the other twelve patients,” Maz said, her voice soft but firm.

Rey swallowed and cleared her throat. “Okay.”

“Four of them had no effects from the surgery, either good or bad. No change in their eyesight, but no trouble, either. Three regained partial sight.” She stopped and sighed heavily. “The other five were not so fortunate. Three suffered partial loss of memory, speech, and balance. They are currently relearning how to do it all, with no recovery of their vision. One recovered her vision, but had complete loss of memory and coordination, and the last had no vision improvement and is now completely paralyzed and unable to speak. They are awake but not aware. Both will spend the rest of their lives in care units.”

Rey felt Poe’s fingers grip her hand tighter, and she herself felt a moment of panic, but then the memory of riding through the cypress trees watching a sunset flowed through her brain. Squeezing Poe’s fingers back, she said firmly, “I still think it’s worth the risk.”

“Worth the risk?!” her father practically shouted. “With odds like that? Rey, think of what you would be giving up if this surgery doesn’t work! You might not be able to ride again, to walk, to talk!” She heard him stand and start pacing the room.

“Luke,” Leia said, trying to calm her brother.

Rey became defensive. “You don’t know what it’s been like for me not being able to see, Daddy!” she argued. “This is my decision, not yours! My life, not yours!”

“It may not be my life, but it will affect my life!” he countered. “It will affect all our lives!” She heard him stop in the middle of the room. “How do you think we’ll feel watching you become a vegetable, huh? You worried about being a burden when you lost your vision. What about when you can’t even move by yourself?”

“Luke!” Leia’s voice was sharp now.

Rey felt anger flow through her. “It’s worth the risk!” she snapped.

“Argh!” Luke groaned. “Leia, do you think it’s worth the risk?”

There was silence for a moment as her aunt contemplated the question. “Personally, no, I don’t think it is, but…” she paused as Rey huffed. “Maybe you should sleep on it?”

“Well, I think it’s crazy,” Han interjected for the first time, always unafraid to offer his opinion. “You’re not some test animal, Rey. If this surgery is so miraculous, then wait a few years until you see more results and hopefully there will be less risk.”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Leia agreed.

“I don’t want to wait!” Rey pushed, knowing deep down she was letting her emotional desire to be healed control her actions right now. Logic had flown out the window the moment Krennic had told her he could help her see. “The Olympics are less than two years away. If I want any chance, I need to start being competitive now!”

“Oh, God, Rey!” her father groused. “You’re young enough there will be plenty of Olympics for you in the future.”

“Not for Bee!” Rey countered.

“Oh, Jesus!” Luke swore, and Rey could just envision him running his hand over his face. “Poe, you’re the only one she’ll listen to apparently. What are your thoughts on this?”

Rey suddenly realized that, though he had been holding her hand this entire time, Poe had remained silent. She tensed, knowing her father was right. Poe’s opinion was the only one that really mattered to her.

“I think,” he said slowly, “that this should be Rey’s decision and Rey’s decision alone. I will back her on whatever she decides.”

Rey felt overwhelming gratitude roar through her. Finally, someone on her side. Poe knew her better than anyone, so she shouldn’t have been surprised. He knew how much being able to see and compete normally again meant to her.

Luke wasn’t as grateful. “Of course, you will,” he said sarcastically. “You want her to compete in the Olympics just as much as she does. You want her to win you the Individual Gold medal that you didn’t.”

Rey gasped. “That’s not fair!” she cried, immediately defensive. “Poe has never pushed me beyond what he knew I was capable of! If he’d just wanted medals out of me, he would have made me get a new horse like all the other trainers I’ve worked with wanted to do. He wants me to be happy and he knows being able to see again will make me happy!”

Suddenly, Maz spoke. “Let’s table this discussion for today, shall we?” Rey heard the small woman stand. “There’s a lot of emotion in this room right now, and what Rey needs is a chance to center herself and think about her options. Like Leia said, I think she needs to sleep on it.” She paused. “In the end, it is indeed her decision, and none of us can make it for her.”

With no small amount of grumbling, Rey’s father, aunt and uncle, and Maz all exited the house, leaving Rey and Poe alone.

After a moment, Rey turned toward Poe. “Are you hungry?” she asked. “I haven’t eaten yet tonight and I think I’m too excited to right now, but I can warm something up for you.”

“No,” he answered. “I’m not hungry.” He paused. “It’s a lot to take in,” he told her. “It’s exhausting just thinking about.”

“Yeah,” she said softly. “Maybe sleeping on it is a good thing.”

“Yeah,” Poe answered, touching her face softly with his hand. “Let’s go to bed.”

But Rey knew she was far too wired to sleep quite yet. However, there were other things to do in the bedroom.

******

Poe lifted his face, letting the water from the shower hit it. His mind was racing and his pulse had yet to return to normal thanks to the anxiety that filled him. He had not expected news like this today.

He took a deep breath, his heart clenching as he thought back to Rey’s expression as she talked about this surgery, how excited she was, how hopeful. He wanted to be happy, he wanted to share that hope, but in reality, he was terrified. As he turned off the water and stepped from the shower, he told himself he wouldn’t show Rey that terror. He would support her no matter what.

He pulled on a pair of boxers and stepped out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. Rey lay reclined back on her elbows on the bed, a soft smile on her face. She was wearing her normal sleep attire, a silky cami and panties, but her position on top of the covers and her expression told him she wasn’t ready for sleep.

“How’s your back?” she asked softly. It was a common question before they had sex. Whatever position they chose depended on the level of pain he was in.

He couldn’t help but laugh softly. “It feels good,” he told her honestly.

“Good,” she replied simply.

“Rey…”

“You know I’m too wired to sleep, but I’ve been told not to make a decision until I ‘sleep on it,’ so I need a distraction and help getting to sleep.”

Poe took a deep breath. A distraction actually sounded good, and if he was honest there was no way he’d ever be able to refuse this woman anything. He moved over to the foot of the bed and kneeled on it, then crawled up toward her. Smiling, she let herself drop down and he positioned himself over her, bracing himself on his elbows. She reached up and brought her hands up behind his head, her fingers diving into his still damp hair, pulling him gently down to her.

He kissed her, softly at first, but it didn’t take long for it to deepen. Tongues tangling, Poe let one of his hands slide over her upper body, his fingers trailing along the silk of her top, moving down until he reached the hem, then slipping underneath, finding the skin of her belly just as smooth. He moved his lips over to her cheek, then her jaw, then down to her neck, kissing and sucking on her lightly. Knowing he had to be careful with certain movements thanks to his back, he rolled over onto his side next to her, the hand on her belly moving to her waist and tugging her with him. She followed, easily.

He let his hand move the cami upward until her breasts were bare, then he scooched his body down just enough that his mouth could reach those same breasts. Rey was making sounds that only increased his arousal, moans and gasps and soft words of encouragement. He wrapped his mouth around one of her nipples, then let his hand drift back down over her belly, his fingers sliding between her legs. He sucked hard at the same time he pressed his fingers against her damp panties, and she let out a loud cry.

He lifted his head, his own body reacting almost violently to her call. “Let me taste you, Rey,” he whispered harshly.

She nodded her head vigorously, her breath coming fast. They were not new to this anymore, but the fact that they could become this aroused this quickly still amazed him. She amazed him. There was no doubt about it; he would die for this woman.

He maneuvered down the bed in between her legs while she half sat up, pulling off her cami. He slid her panties off, then positioned himself flat on his belly, his back straight so as to not strain it, his face right in front of her pussy. He breathed in her scent, then smiled as she brought her legs up, grabbing herself under her knees, intent on keeping out of his way. He knew from experience that that position wouldn’t last long, especially if he worked more than one orgasm out of her, but he appreciated the attempt. Using his fingers, he started to play with her folds, opening her and letting his thumb slide inside, spreading her juices. She whined, and her hips jerked slightly. He moved in, lapping her with his tongue, reveling in her open and honest reactions. She had never had anyone do this to her until he had, and she had quickly become addicted. Which suited him just fine, as he loved doing it even more than he loved when she returned the favor and explored him with her mouth.

He licked her and toyed with her using his fingers for quite some time, feeling her near the edge more than once. He would back off then, placing soft kisses on her thigh. As he predicted, her grip on her legs loosened and eventually she dropped them. One leg fell lax toward the side, but the foot of her other leg settled on his upper back.

His tongue found her clit, which was swollen and hard, and he gave it a quick suck. Just that sudden action was enough to cause Rey to orgasm. A soft screech and her hand dropping down to grip his hair was his reward. Nope, he thought. Not enough. He brought two fingers up and slid them inside while he continued to suck softly on her clit, rolling his tongue around it. He pumped his fingers steadily, curling them up and brushing the inside wall of her cunt. Within moments, she was convulsing again. “Fuck!” she shouted, and he couldn’t help but smile. Rey never swore except during sex.

He sucked on her some more as her pussy flooded with moisture, then he licked her greedily before pulling himself up and sitting back on his heels, keeping his fingers buried inside her. He began to thrust his hand quickly in and out, hitting her clit with his thumb as often as possible, and she started to wriggle and squirm frantically. “Poe!” she cried.

“Come on, baby,” he ground out. His own erection was becoming almost unbearable, but he was determined. Finally, he felt another rush of moisture, just as her hips rose high off the bed. She squealed and he continued to pump her as she squirted onto his hand and onto the bed. He grinned. He had heard of women ‘ejaculating,’ but had never experienced it himself.

Rey let her hips drop, panting, her eyes wide. “Oh, God!” she gasped. “I’m sorry!”

Poe laughed. “Completely normal, sweetheart,” he told her. “Not all women do that, but as long as it feels good it’s natural and okay.” He slowly removed his fingers, wiping them on the bed covers that were already messy now; he’d pull them off and throw them in the wash when they were done. “Now how do you want me?”

Rey smiled and sat up. “From behind,” she said softly. While they had explored many positions since they had become lovers, Rey had taken a specific liking to being mounted from behind. It wasn’t something Poe could always do thanks to his back, but tonight he was game.

“Turn around,” he told her roughly.

Her eyes bright and her face and upper chest still red from her orgasms, Rey jumped up and turned her back to him, kneeling down in front of him and lowering her upper body down to rest on her elbows. Poe raised himself up, quickly removing his boxers, then reached over to snatch the condom Rey had put on the nightstand. He positioned himself behind her and grabbed her hips, his cock as hard as it had ever been. He slid it into her, then pulled out, teasing her with his tip. Her head dropped down and she groaned. He slid in, then out, then in, then out again. “Poe!” she cried out softly.

Finally, he let himself sink all the way into her, groaning at the sensation of wet heat that enveloped him. He began to pump, slowly, then quickly, letting his hips smack hard into her ass, then slowly again. He loved keeping her guessing, and his irregular pattern helped to extend their pleasure. Finally, however, her heat and her cries and the sounds he made as he pushed in and out of her soaking wet pussy were too hard to fight. He began to pump faster and steadier, and she responded by bringing one of her hands back to grab his wrist. “Yes!” she cried. “Oh, God, I’m coming again!”

He felt her walls contract around him and he thrust even harder, feeling his lower back tighten in a good way as he finally released himself inside her.

A few minutes later, after he had removed the bedspread and cleaned them both up with a washcloth, they cuddled under the sheet, Rey’s head on Poe’s shoulder, her arm around his chest.

“I want to thank you for supporting me tonight,” Rey said softly. “I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t on my side on this.”

“Always,” he whispered back, but he knew she could feel his body tense.

“I know,” she responded. “But please be honest. What do you think about this surgery?”

He was silent for a long moment. Finally, “Honestly, Rey, it scares the hell out of me.”

She bit her lip.

“But I promise that whatever you decide, I will be by your side through it all. Forever.

Rey nodded, taking a deep breath.

“Just answer one question for me, okay?” he continued.

“Of course.”

“Are you happy?”

“What?”

“Are you happy? With me? With this life?”

“Of course, I am!” she gasped. “But Poe… to see again…”

“I know! I know!” he soothed. He brought his hand up to stroke her hair. “I know whatever you decide will be the right thing for us.” He paused. “Let’s sleep. You’ll have your answer by morning. I know you will.”

He prayed he was right.

******

When Rey opened her eyes the next morning, she knew she was dreaming. She knew, because she could see.

Sunlight streamed into the room, and she loved the fact that she could see it out of the corner of her eye instead of just feeling its heat. She blinked and focused on the TV along the wall. Why was there a TV there, she wondered? She knew there was a big flatscreen in the living room, but not in the bedroom.

“Morning, sweetheart!”

The sound of Poe’s voice off to her side made joy flow through her, but then confusion set in when she found she couldn’t turn her head to look at him. He came into view, hovering over her as she lay in the bed, a tired smile on his face.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked. He reached down to straighten the covers around her. “Are you hungry? I think we should move you to the chair today.”

The bed underneath her moved and her upper body rose. Even more confused, she tried to move again, to look around her, to raise her hand.

She couldn’t.

She could see, but she couldn’t move.

Poe pulled the blankets off of her and leaned over, one arm reaching under her legs, the other going behind her back. He was going to pick her up! She could see the determination on his face, and also the pain. But he was still going to do it!

“No!” she shouted, but nothing came out.

Rey’s eyes popped open, this time to the familiar darkness she had lived with for almost eight months now. She reached over and found Poe’s warm body still close beside her, and her breath caught in relief. She felt his naked arm for a moment, listening to his steady breathing as he slept, trying to match her own breathing to his to slow hers down. Gradually, her racing heart also slowed.

With a heavy sigh, she sat up and slid out from underneath the sheet. She walked carefully to the closet, grabbing her short robe that she kept on the hanger farthest to the left, and pulled it on. Then she moved out of the bedroom, through the living room, and to the little kitchen/dining room. She sat on a chair at the table and took another breath, her hands still shaking.

She knew exactly what the dream had been about. It had been a ‘what if’ moment. What if she did the surgery and gained back her vision but lost everything else. She knew the odds of that happening were even longer than those of actually recovering her vision without any problems, but there was still a chance. Earlier, she had been less frightened of it happening, if only because she was so determined to see again. The risk was worth it to her. But what about Poe?

Her father had asked the question. What about others in her life? How would a failed surgery affect them? In the back of her mind, she had thought ‘put me in the hospital until I die and go on with your life.’ She didn’t need to be a burden to anyone but the people paid to take care of her. But deep down she knew that wasn’t what would happen. Poe’s assurance that he would be by her side ‘through it all. Forever,’ took on more meaning. He wasn’t lying. He would take care of her himself, even at the detriment of his own health and wellbeing. Because that’s just who he was, someone who gave and gave, without any expectation of getting anything back. When he loved, he loved with everything in him.

How could she be so selfish as to not think about that? Even back when she had first lost her sight and had bemoaned the fact that she was a ‘burden’ to others, she was being selfish. It wasn’t so much that the people caring for her were missing out on other aspects of their lives while taking care of her, but that she feared their resentment of her for keeping them from those things. She felt tears slide down her face as she felt guilt and humiliation overwhelm her.

Was she happy?

Poe’s question from earlier resounded in her brain. Yes. Yes, she was happy. Happier than she had ever been in her entire life. She had the man of her dreams as her partner and she knew he loved her. She was riding and competing successfully and more than that she was enjoying it! She had independence here in this little house that she was overjoyed to call home, and a beautiful barn with horses galore right outside her front door, a literal childhood dream come true. She was writing and loving it, working at a job she tolerated if not enjoyed, but hoped would be only temporary, and she had every confidence that she would have a family of her own in the future. The idea of having children with Poe was exciting and beautiful. Despite her blindness, her life was amazing.

So why did she want to risk it? Why couldn’t she do what her uncle suggested and wait a few years to see if this treatment became safer with more consistent positive results? Was the remembered desolation and hopelessness from her time right after the accident still there in her heart? If so, why?

“Rey?”

Poe’s voice pulled her out of her reflections. He sounded worried.

“Hey!” she responded brightly. “What time is it?”

“The sun’s barely up, so early,” he answered, his voice a bit more relaxed. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she answered. “Just thinking.”

He was silent for so long, she started to get worried. Finally, he said in a rush, “Wait right there! I’ll be right back!”

Smiling to herself, she rubbed her face and ran her fingers through her hair. Who knew what she looked like. After being thoroughly debauched by Poe last night before going to sleep, she must look like a wanton this morning. She heard him come back into the room, his bare feet almost silent on the linoleum floor. Silent to all but her and her ultra-sensitive hearing. He pulled out one of the chairs and drew it closer to her before sitting in it.

“Okay,” he started, huffing out a breath. “I was going to do this last night but obviously other things happened, so I decided to wait. But I just don’t want to wait any longer.” He gently grabbed her hand and placed a small object in it.

She brought up her other hand to feel it, immediately recognizing it as a ring. Her heart started racing again. She felt it carefully, feeling the smoothness of the band, the hardness of the gem in the center, and what felt like a dozen or more little gems surrounding it and along the top of the band. “Oh!” she breathed.

“It’s white gold,” Poe described it for her. “There’s a diamond solitaire in the middle and several little diamonds around it in a horseshoe pattern.”

Rey’s fingers felt the pattern he described, and tears filled her eyes. “It’s perfect,” she whispered.

“It’s yours,” he said, and she could hear the smile in his voice. “Rey Skywalker, will you marry me?”

Sniffling now, Rey nodded. “Yes!” This was a question she didn’t even have to think about. She had known the answer weeks ago. She had just been waiting for the right time to answer.

Poe’s warm, calloused hands engulfed hers. He brought them up to his lips and kissed them, then took the ring from her and slid it onto her left ring finger. He cupped her face and brought his lips to hers. Laughing through her tears, she kissed him back, her heart squeezing a bit as she realized this made her final decision about the surgery even easier to answer.

She pulled back and licked her lips. “And as for that other question,” she started as Poe’s hands once more grasped hers. “My answer is no.”

“No?” His voice was breathy.

“No, I’m not doing the surgery. It’s not worth losing this. Nothing is worth losing this.”

Poe squeezed her fingers with his own and let out a huge sigh. “Oh, thank God!” he gasped. “I wanted what was best for you but I was so scared!”

“I know!” she told him. “And I am so grateful you were with me on this, but yeah…” she paused. “Your question about whether I was happy made me think deeper. I am who I am now because of that accident, because of my blindness, and I like who I am. I don’t like the person that only wants to see again. She is one-dimensional. She’s selfish. She doesn’t really know how to love. I don’t want to be her anymore.”

Poe pulled her into his arms, and she buried her face in his neck. “You aren’t,” he told her. “You may not see visually, but you see everything else. You are complex and caring and you love with everything in you. And I love you with everything in me.”

Rey nuzzled his neck and pulled back. “We should probably get dressed and go tell Dad the news.”

“Well, you’re gonna tell him about the surgery, first,” Poe told her, laughter in his voice. “That way he’s in a good mood when you tell him we’re getting married.”

Rey laughed. “I don’t think he’ll be upset by this,” she said, holding up her left hand and touching the ring. “I think he’ll be glad you’re making an honest woman of me.”

Poe snorted.

“I love you, Poe,” Rey told him.

“I love you, too, Rey,” he said back.

“Let the future begin.”

******

September 2024 – Versailles, France

Paralympic Summer Games

The late summer sun beat down on Poe as he made his way down the center line of the dressage arena. He took in his surroundings as he walked along, remembering a similar day eight years ago when he rode a big black horse into a comparable arena in Rio de Janeiro. Today he was on foot, and it was his wife that would be riding into this arena shortly. He had left the Olympic Games that year with two medals. Rey had barely missed the podium in the Para Equestrian team competition earlier this week, with the United States placing a very close fourth, but she stood a very good chance of medaling today in the Grade IV Individual Championships.

He glanced up at one of the giant monitors that were allowing the people in the sold-out grandstands to see close-ups of the horses and riders, and saw himself on the big screen. He couldn’t hear the announcer well, but he knew from the applause that he had been introduced and his own past success as an Olympian was being broadcast. He reached ‘X’ and turned, tapping the end of his cane firmly on the sandy ground in front of him as he focused on the end of the arena. He didn’t acknowledge the crowd; it wasn’t about him today.

He saw the big chestnut horse walk in from the corner gate with tiny little Rose walking at his head. They made their way toward the dressage ring as he heard the announcer introduce her, in both English and French. “Our next rider, from the United States, is Rey Skywalker-Dameron. She is riding her own Thoroughbred gelding, Blacktieandburbon, a former racehorse. Ms. Skywalker-Dameron is completely blind.”

Rose stopped at the outside corner of the dressage ring where she let Rey know her position and then left them. Rey cued BeeBee into a trot and Poe turned to follow them with his eyes. She stayed far enough back away from the ring boundary so that she wouldn’t run Bee into the decorative plants that stood at every letter. He watched carefully until she was past the judges stands at the end of the arena before he called out “Corner!” Without missing a beat, they turned to the right, continuing to trot along in a beautifully balanced dance behind the judges. As she did so, the bell rang. He let her know where the next corner was, and soon she was trotting back up the other side. She asked Bee for an extended trot for a few strides, and her horse responded without hesitation. One of the officials had commented after their team test that they looked as if they were capable of riding Grand Prix. It just so happened they were currently schooling at the Grand Prix level back home; Rey hoped to start competing at that level next year in the USDF shows.

Poe called out the last corner, then “A.” Rey and Bee entered the arena smoothly and elegantly. Rey’s score during the team competition, though the highest of the four U.S. riders, had still not been as good as it could have been. Bee had been nervous in the daunting environment here at Versailles, and Poe didn’t blame him. While he had been able to describe the venue to Rey, he couldn’t tell the horse there weren’t monsters hiding in the judge’s boxes. Or that the thousands of people screaming and clapping up in the stands weren’t going to rush them at any moment. Despite his nervous energy, he had listened to his mistress and done a good test, with no mistakes, just with a little less flair than normal. Today, he knew what was going on, his confidence back, and his brilliance once more on display.

“X!” Poe called out as he stepped to the side. The eyes of several officials were on him and him alone during this test, ensuring he didn’t say anything other than what needed to be said for Rey to complete the test. Despite knowing this, he couldn’t help but feel his lips quirk up at the corners as his wife, face relaxed and confident, saluted the main judge (there were five total). She looked amazing in her navy-blue shadbelly coat and white breaches. The coat just barely disguised her baby bump. It was not publicly known that Rey was four months pregnant, and it would not be announced until competition was completed later today. If she medaled, she wouldn’t be on that podium alone.

Poe continued calling out letters as he watched Rey and Bee perform the test flawlessly. He felt pride, of course, knowing he was responsible for getting her this far, but he also felt humbled, because her natural talent was something almost otherworldly. She had always been an amazing rider, but since losing her sight he truly believed she had become even better. She could feel her horse so completely as to almost read his mind. And it wasn’t just Bee she could read. Rey had started training two young horses at home, one another off-the-track Thoroughbred, the other a rescue of unknown breeding. While Poe supervised her riding, he rarely had to do anything more than inform her when she got too close to the arena fence. She planned to start showing both horses next year.

After the baby was born.

All too soon, Rey was coming down the centerline once more. “X” Poe said once last time, and stepped aside. In his eye, the test had been perfect, but he wasn’t one of the judges, and dressage judges were often known to be a bit biased, if unconsciously so. Rey saluted the judge again, a small smile on her face. She knew they had kicked ass, and not even a low score could change that fact.

The huge crowd which surrounded three sides of the venue started cheering, and the roar was amazing. Bee barely bobbed his head at the noise. Taking a deep breath, Rey dropped the reins and tilted her head in his direction. Poe came up to Bee’s head, then turned to head out of the arena without touching either the horse or his rider. Bee, as he had learned to do, turned and followed Poe.

The trio met Rose at the gate and the four of them walked to the warm-up arena where Finn waited with Bee’s halter and a pocket full of treats. Rey stayed on his back as they stood together, Finn feeding Bee and Poe standing next to Rey, his hand on her thigh. Finally: “Rey Skywalker-Dameron’s cumulative score is 83.393%, which puts her in the lead and secures her place on the podium with a Bronze medal.”

Poe started laughing and squeezed Rey’s thigh. Neither of them said anything. With two top riders to go, one from Latvia and another from Great Britain, they still had to wait for the final results, but she had a medal. As she was wont to do after a big test, Rey swung her leg over Bee’s neck and slid down right into Poe’s arms. She hugged him tight, then she turned and hugged Bee, Rose and Finn in turn.

While Finn and Rose led Bee back to the barn for water, Poe led Rey to a seat near the rest of her teammates and coaches, where he gave her a ‘play by play’ of the last two rides. The Latvian rider was correct, but lacked brilliance, and he scored under the 80% range. Rey had the Silver medal. The British rider was spectacular. Rey and Poe had gotten to know the woman, an amputee who was missing her right arm, and Poe knew neither he nor Rey would begrudge the woman if she won the Gold, but he couldn’t help hoping her score would be lacking. When the announcer called out a score of 81.537%, Poe was stunned for a moment. Rey turned to him, her eyes shining, a glorious smile on her face.

She had just won the Gold medal.

“You won!” he gushed. “You won!”

“Oh, Poe,” she grinned as he swept her up into another hug. “I won the day I met you. This is just one of the many prizes I’ve gotten since then!”

Poe laughed, pulling back just as the rest of her team moved in to congratulate her.

There would be more competitions in the future, maybe even more Paralympics and World Championships. But he knew no medal, no championship, no accolade either of them had yet to earn, would ever compare to having this woman as a part of his life. Her courage, her perseverance, her stubbornness, and the growth he was able to witness first hand into the amazing woman she had become, was worth more than any prize anywhere.

The future was theirs for the making.

THE END

“There are far, far better things ahead than what we actually leave behind.” C. S. Lewis